Internet dating

The reason Internet dating is bad…

http://www.esquire.com/the-side/video/worst-dating-videos?src=rss

I don’t go to bars or drink alcohol, but I can see why people look for that special someone in those locations, in their drunken, hazed, beer goggles. We tend to forget the annoying parts of courting someone when they can barely keep from falling on their face. But, Internet video dating profiles gives you all you need to know without the alcohol.

Check out the video profiles of these people seeking a loved one.

I will put my two-cents in.

Sam: This guy really needs some sunlight. At first, I thought the movie character Powder was doing a profile. Note to Sam: Limiting your prospects to redheads limits your options. Change it to; I’ll take anything that comes my way.

Chandelier: I found her somewhat cute, but a bit demanding. She has a problem with a guy’s black shoes? You don know that shoes aren’t genetically attached to men’s feet. They can be removed like anything else he’s wearing. Chandelier, I have no black shoes and I barely use my cell phone, call me (that is if I answer it).

Asshole: Is that really your name? Rapping a profile isn’t considered cool. Leave it to people who can rap. The profile name says it all.

Alice Wang: Her friends do all the talking. I half expected the Cloverfield monster to show up and start smashing things. This could be a wonderful opening to Cloverfield II.

Danny: No comment. He might come after me. Note to potential dates: If he has a shovel, duck tape and a cam, don’t get in the car!

(UPDATE: Looks like someone from the Alice Wang camp removed their video.)