Top 50 Bad Movies of the 2000s (1-10)

Top 50 Bad Movies of the 2000s (1-10)

Ah, the 2000s brought us many things. Some of them good and some of them bad. It is a decade of many good movies, but there were tons of bad movies out there. To my surprise, I saw many of them. Now, people might wonder why I might subject myself to some of these shitty movies, but it is because I view myself as a critic. To understand good art, you also have to look at what doesn’t work either. Some movies are so bad that they end up fun (Tango and Cash anyone?)

And, it is fun to rip into shitty movies that have taken away hours of your life. So with that, I am going to rip into my Top 50 Bad Movies of the 2000s. I’ll go through ten movies in each post I do, starting with 1-10 and the worst being number 50.

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Glitter

1. Glitter (2001): Man, I just watched this Mariah Carey movie just recently on TV. I can’t believe how bad Mariah is in this movie. She is terrible. Her makeup is way overdone, because she looks like a clown. Keep in mind that Mariah Carey had a major nervous breakdown during this time. I hate this movie, but soundtrack isn’t that bad.

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Meet Dave

2. Meet Dave: Screw Eddie Murphy! If can’t even be bothered to show up to his own premiere, why should we care about the movie? The movie has a robotic Eddie Murphy shitting out dollar bills, enough said.

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Norbit

3. Norbit: How do you copy the Nutty Professor concept, but make it ten times worst? That’s where Norbit comes in. From the same shitty director that brought us Meet Dave, we get this piece of crap brought to us. I personally think Eddie has something against heavier women, because the Rasputia character is beyond mean and evil. I don’t understand why some people like this movie. It is a disgusting little movie and you shouldn’t watch it.

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The Love Guru

"Yeah, baby, yeeeaaaahhhh!"

4. The Love Guru: Uh, was this comedy supposed to be funny? It’s like Mike Myers hasn’t left the 90s like the rest of us, because he still uses the same jokes that he wrote back in that decade. The Love Guru is merely a remake of Austin Powers…but crappier. BTW, Jessica Alba’s career went to the birds after this movie.

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Kickin It Old Skool

5. Kickin It Old Skool: Yo, Jamie Kennedy, the old white rapper parody thing is played out now. Enough is enough. Stop making movies or I will force you to watch this movie over and over. This movie is lazy. Not even the dancing is that good.

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Strange Wilderness

6. Strange Wilderness: Was this even a movie? While the trailers were funny, the actual story isn’t even that funny. It is basically a movie for all of Adam Sandler’s friends to show up and goof off.

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Catwoman

Halle Berry: “If we make a break for it now, we can run away from this movie. Are you with me?”

7. Catwoman: This was probably one of my first movie reviews on my blog. It still has a warm place in my heart…like heartburn. When you mix Pitof, Halle Berry, Benjamin Bratt, and Sharon Stone, you get this mixture of shit. What was WB thinking?

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Feardotcom

From Blade to this mess.

8. FeardotCom: What happens when you remake The Ring after remaking The Ring? You make this piece of crap. Now, a damn web site can kill you. The movie certainly didn’t help Stephen Dorff’s career. What the hell was this movie about again? So, websites can kill you? Interesting…

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One Missed Call

"A better movie is calling you."

9. One Missed Call : Killer cell phones are the main focus of this gutless movie. Any movie that has Margaret Cho playing a seasoned cop has to be bad. Edward Burns is horrid in this silly “The Ring” knockoff. Did I mention the ghost in this movie kills a cat too?

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DOA: Dead or Alive:

Even sweaty fighting women can save this flaming turd.

10. DOA: Dead or Alive: This movie based on the very bouncy fighting videogame was so bad that they only released the movie in 500 theaters in the US. There was very little promotion for this movie inside the US. The only reason to see this movie is to see hot women fighting each other. Didn’t they learn anything from the Street Fighter movies or the second Mortal Kombat movie?