Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Making the best Chick Flick. Part one

Making the best Chick Flick. Part one

If you have a girlfriend, then you’ve been forced to watch a chick flick. These things are terrible to watch and worst when you have to go to a theater. On the other hand, women tend to hate sci-fi.

I remember going on a date with this girl and we went to the movies. The trailers came on a trailer for one of the Star Trek TNG movies came on screen. She leaned toward me and said, “Is this Star Trek? I hate Star Trek.”

Well, I don’t date her anymore…

Anyway, do you want to write a Chick-Flick? This link will show you.

http://www.randomhouse.com/broadway/catalog/display.pperl?isbn=9780767918183&view=excerpt

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Taking these steps I’ve come up with the Greatest Chick-Flick

((Step One: Create a Sympathetic Heroine))

The girl’s name is Megan Chambers. She’s fat, okay not really lumpy fat, but chunky in all the right places. She wears glasses and can’t seem to find a date. Early on, we see scenes with her going out on terrible dates. Chicks will like these scenes.

She will work at a Starbucks, but will write poetry that sounds great. She dreams of getting laid by the right man…

((Step Two: Offer up a Love-Worthy Hero))

You have to have the prefect man that listens to every useless word she says. He has to smile a lot and have a 5 O’clock shadow. He usually has nice teeth and a full head of hair. He will bump into Megan in a shop or store. They will lock eyes and fall in love.

This ‘Hero’ must have a Latino/Black friend that is the comic relief. Telling him, “Boy, you better hit that, yo.”

Next time: Megan Chambers’ friend

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

i actually saw star trek insurrection with a girl. wasn't officially a date or anything, but there are women with character in the world.

and i fully agree, chick flicks suck, just like 90% of the shows on the WB, it's all an anti-male conspiracy.

Jeff said...

Don't forget, "Throw in phrases like 'oopsy daisy' occasionally by the man to make him seem romantically silly. It helps to have a British accent."

Semaj said...

@ Paul: All those WB shows are mini-chick movies. If I hear one more thing about the "OC"...

@ Jeff: That's so right, I forgot about the accent. There does need to be a goofy charm to the guy.

 
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