Wednesday, August 07, 2013

Bucky Larson: Born to be a Star

Bucky Larson: Born to be a Star
This might be the worst movie I’ve seen in a long time.  It is disjointed and poorly directed that it makes the spoof movies look like high art.  I am not lying.  The movie takes everything that is bad about the recent Happy Madison movies and turned it up to a worst grade of shit.  What it boils down to is that the jokes aren’t funny.   The main character is a drip and the script is nothing but jizz and penis jokes.  I am all for that, but there has to be a good story behind the crude jokes, but there is nothing there. 
Nothing here is redeemable.  The movie is a complete steaming turd, and it seems to be proud of its stinky nature.  
The basic plot is Bucky finds out that his parents were huge pornstars from the 70s.  Bucky decides to become a pornstar too, but he’s penis is too small.  But, he has the ability to shot a lot of sperm without even touching the woman.  He becomes a big hit with fans.  That’s the whole story and joke.  Enjoy.  
I’d take a new Eddie Murphy movie over this shit! 
The movie is a collection of “jokes” rammed to together to make this loose feature.  There isn’t really a cohesive narrative in the same manner as Strange Wilderness.  Throw in sex and porn jokes with jokes about the main character’s appearance, and they keep doing over and over again with.
I dare you all to attempt to watch this movie fully through.  You won’t be able to make it. 
There is nothing that stands out as being funny or an appearance of a movie.  Forget this movie and everyone else in it. 
-Nick Swardson is terrible as Bucky Larson.  This is sad because we have to be around this annoying and dumb character the entire movie.  Nick seems to only get work with his friend Adam Sandler, and this one is no different.  This is a Sandler joint and Swardson shows again he’s not that good at acting, but leeches onto Sandler's stuff.  Why do people find this guy funny?  
-Christina Ricci, this is below you.  Why are you end up in the movie?  I felt bad for her.  Spoiler Alert: Ricci doesn’t get naked. 
-Don Johnson:  He’s in this movie and he cusses a lot.  There is not much else to say about him. 
-Kevin Nealon:  He yells a lot at Bucky and then leaves the scene.  Nothing else happens. 
Grade: F-
Note: If I could give this movie a Z, I would.  
 What's wrong with your Faaaacccceeee!
 The same damn Buck Teeth joke over and over again.  We get it, movie. 
 The Adams Family Reunion was a huge hit.  
 Christina. you should know not to look into bushes after hearing strange sounds.  
Damn it, Frost is still alive. Blade didn't kill him. Stephen Dorff is in this movie as a weak villain. He's playing a poor man's Peter North. (Note: Looking up Peter North is not safe for work or anything dry.)  


MC said...

I thought Swardson was ok in 30 Minutes or Less, and that is about it.

Semaj said...

I still haven't seen that yet. I guess he's okay when he's not around Adam Sandler.

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