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BMW Films Back in 2001 and 02, BMW created an interesting Internet marketing idea of making a collection of small action films for the web to promote their brand. Clive Owen starred in all the films as The Driver. For the most part, different directors directed the movies. It is interesting to see the different styles that the various directors took in their little films. See if you can spot all the big name stars in these films. Here are a few of my favorites. Beat The Devil http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06NMiUR5mqU&mode=related&search=BMW%20Films ________________________ Ticker http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8ys731U54Q&mode=related&search=BMW%20Films ____________________________ Ambush http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aARKzyO-P7w&mode=related&search=BMW%20Films

Remembering the agonybooth.com ’s review of Steven Seagal ’ s energy drink Lightning Bolt , I knew there had to be a way to try this horrible drink. The drink wasn’t in most stores (except 711), and I sure as hell wasn’t going to buy it online. One day, while shopping in Walmart, I went to an area to buy my normal energy drinks, when I saw it: Steven Seagal’s face poorly painted on a can looking back at me, glaring at me in fact. I read the review on the site and I knew always wanted to try this drink. So, I bought one, Cherry Charged! It was Friday night and I was getting ready for work. I opened the can and took a large gulp. It tasted so bad. Man, it tasted like someone took a juicer and threw in all kinds of rotten fruits. It was a strong bitter taste, and because I paid a dollar for this damn thing, I managed to drink most of it. Yet, I couldn’t finish it all. The worst part was the bad after-taste it left in my mouth. I had that atrocious taste for...

I’ve been impressed with Deadwood this season. There have been a lot of interesting things happening this year on the show. It seems the writers are setting up the big fire that happened in the real Deadwood. Source http://www.answers.com/topic/deadwood-south-dakota ((A fire on September 26 , 1879 devastated the town, destroying over 300 buildings and consuming everything belonging to many inhabitants. Unable to reenact the climbs to fortune which had characterized the town's early days, now that its economy was more mature, without the promise of rich untapped veins of ore in the wilderness for anyone to claim, many of the newly impoverished left town to try their luck elsewhere.)) Here’s another interesting fact most of the characters on the show were real people, Calamity Jane and Wild Bill Hickok naming a few. Wyatt Earp and George Hearst are major factors in the show this season. (The Hearst family is still around today with newspapers and other media...

WTF? Super Soaker Oozinator http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXC7qZ_iWgM&mode=related&search = Okay, this is so disturbing. This item is real too. Why would any kid want to buy one of these things? And, you can buy it here! http://www.hasbrotoyshop.com/ProductsByBrand.htm?BR=605&ID=17359&PG=1 ((Features Sneak up on your opponents with a surprise bio-ooze attack! Just when they think you're coming at `em with water, blast `em with a shot of icky bio-ooze! Shoot out globs of gooey bio-ooze and then drench `em with water! It's a double blast attack that'll keep your opponents on their toes and running during every water fight. With the OOZINATOR blaster you don't just get soaked, you get drenched! Air-powered blaster lets you drench your opponents with powerful blasts of water or globs of gooey bio-ooze! Hit targets up to 35 feet away with a 27-ounce water-supply capacity or up to 20 feet away with a 10-ounce bio-ooze capacity! Blaster...

Top Road Comedy Movies, According to me. 8. Black Sheep (uh, Tommy Boy 2): Chris Farley and David Spade team up again in another road movie. While not as good as Tommy Boy, I still quote lines from this one, but I also mistakenly quote this movie, thinking it came from Tommy Boy . 7. The Muppet Movie : Okay, call me names, but I loved this movie when I was a kid. This movie was basically a Prequel of sorts, showing us how all the Muppets first met each other. I need to get the DVD. (Note: there’s a Big Bird cameo in this one.) 6. Tommy Boy : One of my favorites. With the Deer that comes back to life and the “Fat Guy in a Little Coat” you can’t go wrong. One of Farley’s best performances 5. Planes, Trains, and Automobiles : John Candy rules this movie with his almost ‘Uncle Buck’ Character. I loved the scene where Candy drives on the wrong side of the highway. 4. The Cannonball Run/Stroker Ace/ Smokey and the Bandit : Same damn movies, ...

Parents are stupid. One of the things that always pisses me off is the fact that parents always throw this thing back in our faces, “I don’t want my kid seeing this. If you had children, you’d understand.” Below is such a post. However, I do agree with the poster that this John Tucker viral movie promotion is getting on my nerves. From John Tucker Must Die (2006) board ( mahatmarandy ) ((I'd never heard of this film until a little bit ago when I saw the longest TV commercial I've ever seen for any movie, much less a dopey little teen sex comedy like this. The commercial had a lot of lurid, dirty stuff in it, and my kid and I were watching TV, so I kept changing the channels so he wouldn't see any dirty stuff, then changing back a minute or two later hoping the commercial was over, only to see chicks kissing or a guy wearing women's underwear, or various inappropriate-for-seven-year-olds-to-watch stuff. The one commercial took up the entire commercial bre...

Ever wanted to draw a Japanese Anime? Strong Bad can teach you… http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail57.html Stinkoman was created with this Strong Bad e-mail. (Actually, this was a name Homestar gave Strong Bad earlier.) Below is the link to a hidden video of Stinkoman fighting a stickman. Let the site run for a moment and Stinkoman should show up. http://www.homestarrunner.com/underconstruction.html whaaaaat are you doing?

Over at Aint it cool , they have some more info on Spiderman 3. http://aintitcool.com/display.cgi?id=23949 Just a few points worth pointing out from the site. ((- Raimi was asked about the music, and specifically about Christopher Young and why Danny Elfman left. Raimi responded saying he wanted Elfman to return to score the film and that he really hoped Young and Elfman would team up together, Young assisting. He give a lot of credit to Danny Elfman and feels he's a big part of the universe. - Regarding Harry Osborn. Riami said he is NOT Green Goblin II and he is NOT Hobgoblin, but something else. He wouldn't say any more than he is still very upset about his father's death and he does use his father's technology to go after Spider-Man.))

Ep V: Kevin Smith Strikes Back Click below for the Joel Seigel trailer HERE

X-Men 1 While over at a friend's house, we popped in the old (2000) X-men movie. We both commented on how believable and tight the plot was compared the sloppy X3. Bryan Singer and David Hayter created a world that was not unlike our own, yet had a comic book feel to it as well. What Singer also brought to the movie was character relationships and interactions. The center relationship in the movie was between Wolverine and Rogue. We got to see how Rogue looked up to Logan as father figure and maybe something more. In this movie, Singer's direction was more laid back than Ratner's in X3. Singer let the story play out in a slower pace, letting characters develop in the film and allowing the plot unfold naturally. Watching Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen battle over ideas, while still having respect for one another was wonderful to watch. There are a few drawbacks to the film however, one of them being Halle Berry . She seems uncomfortable playing Storm and she act...

http://nappydiatribe.blogspot.com/2006/07/kevin-smith-unleashed-dude-dont-walk.html#comments The Humanity Critic has a great article on Kevin Smith vs. Critic Joel Siegel. Joel walked out of the screening for Clerks 2 and made a scene by shouting to his fellow reviewers. He should have simply walked out and not made a scene. (Also, check the mp3 with Smith and Siegel.) ((Check this shit out: roughly forty minutes into the flick, when Randal orders up the third act donkey show, Siegel bellowed to his fellow critics “Time to go!'’ and “This is the first movie I’ve walked out of in 30 fucking years!'’ Now, I don’t need Joel Siegel to suck my dick the way he apparently sucks M. Night’s, gushing over his flick before he’s even seen it; but shit, man - how about a little common fucking courtesy? Never mind the fact that when you’re paid to watch movies for a living and the only tasks required of you are to a) sit through said movies and b) write your thoughts about t...

http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/9574987/detail.html?subid=22100484&qs=1;bp=t What do you do when you steal someone’s truck/SUV? You run over the owner. (( DENVER -- A Denver man is in critical condition Tuesday after he was run over by his own stolen truck. Gerardo Chavez saw his stolen pick-up truck downtown Sunday evening at 17th and Welton Street and he tried to get it back. He was then run over by the driver of the pick-up truck and is in critical condition at Denver Health. Chavez is being treated for a collapsed lung and has suffered several broken ribs)) Man, that’s pretty mean. Stealing a truck is one thing, but running over the owner is just being an a$$hole.

Random Thoughts ~Man, I’ve been so busy with writing this damn book that today I’m taking a day off. ~One of my friends is taking art classes. He showed me some of his drawings. The guy has come a long way within a few weeks. He told me that he has to draw a nude model everyday. Hmm, looking at a naked woman everyday doesn’t sound so bad. I wonder what you say to her if you see her outside work. “You look so different with your clothes on…” ~Remember that entry about that fat dude? Well, he ended up quitting a few months back. Thank goodness, because I didn’t want to smell him. He smelled really bad. ~Is it peanut butter jelly time! ~Yoda is the man, er I mean frog.

Yep, these rules pretty much sum up women. AKA The Secret Rules of Women http://blogsareforwimps.blogspot.com/2006/05/secret-rules-of-women.html I’d like to add one: Instead of doing something about it, It’s okay for her to cry uncontrollable when something bad happens.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ri_daJuIdPQ&search=Venture%20Bros I loved this intro for a Venture Bros. Episode. Basically, these guys are a couple of henchmen that have been out of work for a long time. They were notified that their leader has broken out of jail. Best part, they begin to sing the Holst "Mars, the Bringer of War” theme.

LCARS Web site… http://www.lcarsdeveloper.com/ This was in the Awful Link of the Day on Something Awful, but I really like this page. It makes me want to have it as a program. What is LCARS? Here ya go http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LCARS (( fictional universe , LCARS (an acronym for Library Computer Access and Retrieval System ), is a computer operating system used on Federation starships . Within Star Trek chronology, the term was first used in Star Trek: The Next Generation and in subsequent shows. In a real-world context, the term "LCARS" is frequently used to describe the style of the computer displays of the LCARS system, especially the screens from The Next Generation. The term "Okudagrams," named for Michael Okuda , the designer of the graphics, is also used to refer to this style. The design is popular among Star Trek fansites .))

Clerks II Even though Kevin Smith said he was done with the whole Jay and Silent Bob universe, he seems to have changed his mind. Despite my apprehension, I was pleasantly surprised with how well Clerks works. This movie, in a lot of ways, is actually superior to the first one. The jokes are dirtier and acting much better. Yet, what really keeps this movie from being just another raunchy comedy is the very serious character arcs the main guys go through in this story. Unlike the pointless dialogue rants in the first one, this one does in fact have a plot. Like many kids in the 80s, we spent a little too much time playing videogames and watching movies to realize we were getting older. In a way, it is in this movie that Randal Graves and Dante Hicks have to come to face the fact that they’re not teenagers anymore. Toward the end of the film, watch Jeff Anderson give a great performance in one of the more serious scenes in the film. (There’s another nice scene wh...

Here’s a funny bit with the Clerks Cartoon turning into a Japanese cartoon http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srhCvc8zi5o&search=Clerks Watch closely for people dying when the transformer turns into a robot.

Aeon flux vs. Ultraviolet http://www.dailyraider.com/index.php?id=3128 Somehow, these two movies were released around the same time on DVD and they both sucked. Ultraviolet ((Violet (Milla Jovovich) lives in a totalitarian world in the future, ruled by Daxus (Nick Chinlund). Once she was a human and the assistant of his husband, a scientist, murdered by the police forces of Daxus, who has turned into vampires a considerable part of the human race just to enlarge his forces. Violet has the task of rescue a secret weapon: a boy named Six (Cameron Bright). After knowing the real intentions of this people with the boy, Violet takes him away and she'll be chased by Daxus, because Six carries in his blood a rare cure, which could heal Violet and all the vampires, in this kind of mix of Matrix, with Aeon Flux and Kill Bill. )) Aeon Flux ((400 years in the future, when disease has wiped out the majority of the earth's population except for one walled, protected city-sta...

Blogs are becoming hip…oh, no. http://www.orlandosentinel.com/technology/orl-blogs2006jul20,0,6377661.story?coll=orl-home-headlines ((The 25-year-old Hansen is among a fast-growing number of Americans -- now numbering 12 million -- who keep a computer log and share it with the world, according to a study released Wednesday.)) Whoa, that many, then again I’m sure they’re including MYSPACE.com, which isn’t really a blog. ((Eight percent of all Internet users now write blogs, while 39 percent read them.)) Somehow, I feel kind of special. I need to get a t-shirt that says, 8% on it.

Peter Cullen will reprise his role as Optimus Prime in the new Transformers movie http://aintitcool.com/display.cgi?id=23937 This is good news. Only Peter Cullen can do the voice of Prime.

Stargate II: the movie? http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=15537 http://www.scifi.com/scifiwire/index.php?category=0&id=37194 Hmm, looks like Dean Devlin may get his sequel wish after all. He wants to make two follow-ups to his first movie. (("When we created the original Stargate, we always envisioned it as a trilogy, and, unfortunately, the way in which the movie got made, we didn't really have control over [it]," Devlin ( The Triangle ) said in an interview at Comic-Con International in San Diego on July 20. "We didn't have the ability to do two and three. MGM had then made a big commitment to doing the [SG-1] series, and they were worried that the movie could interfere with the series. Well, now that the series has run so successfully for so long and spawned a second series, and there's a whole new regime at MGM, they're not really worried about [it]. The series is running great on its own. And they think there is an aud...

Suikoden V A while back, I rented the RPG Suikoden V on the PS2. The game takes a very long time to get going, (like 4-6 hours, lots of text), but it’s well worth it, trust me. When the game switches gears, the story becomes very interesting. Even though the game is set on the same planet as the other Suikoden games, you don’t need to play the other ones to understand this one. You play as a Prince whose (The Queen) mother has begun to loose her mind. Your first mission is to visit a village that was punished by her. When the village tried to revolt against her kingdom, she used a Sun Rune to dry out the lake, which in turn killed most of the plants and animals. I thought it was interesting to see the so-called heroes in a shade of gray. The graphics for the cut scenes are nice, but some of the character models for the town areas are dull. The environments for some of the areas are beautiful. The battle system let’s you have up to six people and for the mos...

Question of the year Why is Godzilla (1998) in a Doritos ad? When I saw this ad in the Superman Returns Theater, I basically turned to my friend and said, “What? Didn’t this Godzilla movie suck?” Why is Doritos promoting their new chips with a crappy CGI remade Godzilla? Is Dean Devlin (producer of the movie) running out of money?

Pamela Adlon One of the few new shows I watch on TV is a show called Lucky Louie . It’s a show on HBO, so it’s full of nudity and cussing, you know everything Network sitcoms can’t show. One of the main co-stars on the show is a woman by the name of Pamela Adlon. At first, I didn’t know who she was and the kind of work she had done. She has a very distinct voice. After looking at her Imdb.com page , I noticed she’s been in a lot of Cartoon shows and videogames. She was even in an episode of Star Trek TNG (Who Watches the Watchers). "The Facts of Life" : Okay, we all make mistakes. You take the good, you take the bad… "Star Trek: The Next Generation" : She played Oji, the daughter of the guy that shoots Picard with an arrow at the end of Who Watches the Watchers . "Spawn" : She was on this very graphic animated show. "The New Batman Adventures" : This was the Bruce Timm Batman. (Note: Tara Strong (Rikku) was ...

Watch Vader with crazy talk http://www.ifilm.com/ifilmdetail/2754667 This one was edited with different sections of dialogue from different movies. There's a few Funny things in there.

http://metromix.chicagotribune.com/movies/mmx-060721-movies-smith,0,2190325.story?coll=mmx-movies_top_heds Kevin Smith is a very good writer. His writing actually elevates his dull directing. I always found it interesting that he closed the book on his Jersey Universe, yet now he has made Clarks 2. I’m torn; I want to see this movie, because I enjoyed his other movies, but this isn’t the kind of movie I would see in the theater. Who knows…

I drive 70-80 anyway. Ky did pass a law as well, but I'm not sure when it will happen. Old People, take note.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYyNY4TDj84 Superman 2 the extended cuts are here. The one above it the original ending that Donner shot for his version of Superman 2. Here are things to look for: 1) In this version, the three main villains get arrested! In the Lester version, they simply disappear in the pit, never to be seen again. 2) There’s a whole bit with Luther trying to make a deal with Superman. He gets arrested. 3) Superman destroys his Fortress of Solitude! This version would have caused a major continuity error in Superman Returns, because his Fortress plays a major role in the movie. 4) Lois actually remembers everything! Superman doesn’t take away her memory. This is a major departure from the Lester cut. I like this one better.

As I was driving through the Walmart parking lot, I noticed a huge amount of cars parked in the F’ing fire lane. I even saw one woman turning on her car alarm! Uh, you’re parked in the front of the store; I seriously doubt somebody wants to take your car in front of a lot of people going in and out. Someday, I hope I see a time when a big ass firetruck comes steamrolling through all these parked cars. 1) Who gave you the right to park in the fire lane and no one else? 2) Why do you have to drop your fat girlfriend off in front of the store in the damn fire lane? Better yet, why can’t she walk from the parking lot to the store? “Sweet! Someone Pimped my ride with a brand new fire hose!” ____________________________________________________ Yeah, even the Mayor gets punked by the firemen. ___________________________________________________ This is a nice picture. The guy deserves it. __________________________________________________ Don’t take my word for it, read t...

Star Trek vs. Star Wars http://www.ifilm.com/ifilmdetail/2748374 I actually like this bit of film Editing . Not the best, but still good.