Dork________________________
I went to Walmart Saturday night/Sunday morning. Of course, I saw the usual backwards minded redneck/ghetto types that infest the store, yet I saw something different. I saw an Elf walking around the store with a shopping cart. I only got a quick glimpse of the guy, and I guessed it was me just seeing things. I went on with my sorry shopping experience.
Once I was done, I headed for the front to check out. Of course, there was a line of people, because Walmart can’t hire people.
I saw another check out lane and I quickly dashed over there. From the corner of my vision, I saw something bright green approach my position. I looked over to see a fully-grown man, in his mid-thirties, dressed in an elf suit, complete with Elf boots with bells.
Now, he wasn’t one of those cool elves like the ones in Lord of the Rings, but the lame Christmas ones (uh, holiday elf). As he happily unloaded his jolly shopping cart, I looked him over without raising suspicion.
I thought, “It’s 2 am in the morning why is this guy walking around in an elf getup this early in the morning?”
I wanted to ask him if he was fighting in The War Against Christmas. However, I let him be, and I left.
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2 comments:
You didn't manage to see what he was purchasing did you? What if he was buying tampons or something like that. Creep-o-rama.
You're right I should have. I was so freaked out I didnt check his cart. I bet he had beer, duck tape and rope. He'll use them in that order.
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