Look here WWE

I’ll just leave this here.   

Etika, just stop

I generally don’t follow Nintendo “Let’s Play” guys because most of them are annoying.  Do all Switch players have issues?  (Don’t answer that.)  The fool decided to send out strange tweets and threats toward Trump.  Some of his fans called the cops on him for a wellness check and he freaked out.   

I have some major mental problems, but I am not going to live tweet and stream my destruction.  When I spent a week in a hospital, the medical staff thought I was in major mental distress and sent a therapist to my room thinking I would cause self-harm to myself.  Are we in an alt-world where this is okay to stream this shit?   

He needs to get a real job and seek mental help and stop streaming.   

The police handled this situation rather well.    I love that some of his fans are trying to spin this as a swatting incident.  It is not.  

Hungrybox vs. Crab

Hungrybox vs. Crab

It's as if Billy Mays was cloned...

Round One. Fight!

Who throws a crab? Maybe he thought the guy was hungry (box). It is in his name.

I had no idea who or what a Hungrybox is or was. I thought it was some sort of frozen food dinner or a Taco Bell box. Someone at work told me he's sort of a villain of the Let's Plays and competitive circles. In other words, a dick. Well, HB won a game of Super Smash Bros competition. An asshat in the audience was so pissed off by the shocking win that he threw a whole crab at HB.

From Newsweek, ((Juan “Hungrybox” DeBiedma of Team Liquid had just defeated long-time rival Joseph “Mango” Marquez of Cloud9 in a tense game of Melee. After DeBiedma shook Marquez’s hand and started to wrap up his controller, a fan threw a dead crab at his head. Picking up the boiled crustacean, DeBiedma yelled at the crowd and asked who had chucked it onto the stage. The clip was captured live on the VGBootcamp Twitch channel, with commentary from casters who seem confused as to what just happened. ))

Either this is a whole new mating ritual or someone was really pissed of that they would chuck an entire tasty crab at the dude. Don't throw a crab, dude. Eat it, because those things are good. Throwing crustaceans at people is not cool and being a sore loser (stupid).

The crab thrower got ban-world. The company running the tournament made a statement on their Twitter, ((We will be perma banning the guy btw. Probably will not be releasing his name publicly but will be submitting it to other Tournament Organizers. We will make an official statement from the Pound Twitter sometime this week so everyone knows this was handled immediately. ))

This incident reminds me of another tournament incident. “Who's bitch this is?”

This is actually a game, but why?

What in the hell is this? Look here (listen), I am not an SJW or a feminist, but this videogame is wrong in every way. First off, why fight off a crowd of women that want to have sex with you? Second, given the cornucopia of porn on the Internet, why even bother getting a game like this? As far as I know, this The Harem Trigger is not related to the Chrono Trigger series. And, even watching this shitty game makes me think Chris Hansen will pop up from the kitchen.

10K really?

This popped and I literally popped up in the Reddit group Freakout. I saw the video and the lady with the 10k boobs did look familiar. Did some Google searching and it is/was Bella Reese. Surprise, she is a pornstar. And, I am not going to lie those are some amazing boobs, Bella. Yep, don't date a pornstar. While they might be great at their jobs, you really don't want to see these ladies IRL.

BTW, notice how fast she ran? Damn, girl. F'ing on screen gives you good cardo.

Side Note: This reminds me of the time when Sara Jay got knocked the f' out.

Woman Stuck in Trench (Reloaded)

Because I am feeling nostalgic, here is another golden Internet video. I still want to know something about this video. Did she fall into the trench or did the trench form around her when she fell? Certain people just find things to fall into no matter what. I also like that her family just films her in the trench. What nice people. Then again, I would have dropped off some burgers and fries and left her in there.

Grape Lady, Remember her?

Grape Lady, Remember her?

Boom goes the dynamite.  

There comes a time that you have been on the Internet as long as I have and remember when these things first popped. I remember writing about her years ago. Damn, I've been doing this Internet thing for a long time.  Forget protecting the Bill of Rights, this should be in the Libary of Congress.  

Do you remember when the memes were new as a baby? The Grape lady was one of the earliest meme/popular videos. I remember a friend showing me this video and being shocked by the sound of a woman falling on her face (not her ass). I also love how her coworkers are pretending to care about her and are probably laughing her plight. Poor Grape Lady. People turned it into a damn song and remixes. After this incident, nothing else was heard or read about her. It was as if The Nothing grabbed her.

No one has really talked to her recently. In many ways, she is the queen of memes. Her name is Melissa Sanders and I'd be willing to interview her about her legend. I'd be nice, Melissa. Over the 26 years, there has been a few things to pop up about her. Maybe she is hanging out with the Numa-Numa Guy or the Chocolate Rain fool.

Look here (listen), we all are only a few missteps away from being the grape lady.  Lord knows I have.  

Side Note: Most young people don't know anything about her.

Are you following this, camera guy?  

Record Store Employee Snobs

Record Store Employee Snobs

You see, kids, we had these buildings that sold hardcover versions of your music called record stores.  Usually, it smelled rather bad in there and had pretentious a-holes working the front counter.  They're the same dudes that you encounter at the coffee shops today wearing their sandals and neck-beards.  

I love that Kenny Loggins sucks so bad that his own autograph brings the value of his used album down. While I don't remember everything about Half Baked, the joke from above always makes me laugh.

The scene reminds me of the High Fidelity scene with Jack Black giving shit to the guy that wants to buy a Stevie Wonder single.

I love that Jack Black refuses to sell the song to the middle age man. Was Jack Black the pre-hipster or the proto-hipster? And, yes the Cosby sweater joke has a completely different meaning today. What are you acussing your friend of, Jack?

Holy Crap, it is a Cosby Sweater.  Even at the height of the Cosby Show, the sweater look was lame.  Now it is just creepy. 

Rust-Ville: Someone has been busy

Just after I wrote that post about our boy Rusty, he decided to write a rebuttal of sorts to that Medium story about him with another Medium story...about him.  It is a bit of ramble, but it does give us an insight into his state of mind from a slanted POV.  The story from Russ is too long and stupid to fully go through, but I wanted to go through a few things.  (And, Russ, this is review and fair use don’t even try to sue me over it.) 

From Medium, ((They say that the entertainment business is all about who you know, not what you know. If you can’t nail an audition, you better know somebody who knows somebody or else you just have to press your luck.)) 

And, this is the problem with your entire generation.  You don’t want to work for fame, because you want the fame thrown onto you.  To have lasting success, you HAVE to skills to grow and change.  Part of that is working your way up the career you want to get into not instantly getting famous.  Think about the entire Jersy Shore guys.  Where are they now?  Damn it, Russ.   

But, wait, there’s more.   

From Medium, ((To condense a long situation: friends encouraged me to send my well-intentioned song to her, figuring that my story and efforts would be my selling point and not the mediocre song. Bewilderedly, Taylor’s agents thought I was trying to get her to do a song, and somehow, even after back and forth calls and emails, they could not understand it was a gift song.)) 

The kicker is now he has retconned the Taylor Swift song as a “gift” song and not an unwanted submission.  If it was a gift song, why not just put it on YouTube instead.  Can’t you see why they had to reject your gift because it looked like an unwanted submission?  Rusty does more retconning than Star Trek Discovery.   

Since this post is pretty long.  I might come back to this Rusty post.  He sort of doesn’t deserve it.   

Chris Chan Tries it: Making his own home the HQ of his fictional world.

Chris Chan Tries it: Making his own home the HQ of his fictional world.

Yes, Chris has decided to make his home in VA the “Sonichu Headquarters”. I am not making this up. When you put in Sonichu Headquarters into Google Maps, it comes up as Chris Chan's home address and it even has a picture of him and his stupid characters. Despite the fact he already doxed himself years ago, he is now inviting people to show up to his house. So, when you Google Search Sonichu Headquarters, you go directly to his house. Damn it, Chris.

This is the Google Maps picture.

When his mother dies, he will no longer own the house and will be forced into a treatment home. Someone else will move in and they will be forced to deal with the Sonichu Headquarters listing in Google Maps. 

Here's the best part though...Chris has “store hours” for his home. Monday-Sunday, 8:30AM to 8:00PM. Are you serious? It would take me nearly 7-8 hours to meet Chris and Sonichu. (With tolls)

This needs to stop and it will not end well for him or his mom. 

Side Note: Grammarly does not list Sonichu as a misspelled word.  Someone had to put "Sonichu" into the Grammarly database.  Think about that. 

Don (Always Online) Mattrick: Do you remember him?

A series of useless compointant...and I am not talking about the Xbox One. 

Don (Always Online) Mattrick:  Do you remember him?  

He worked for EA for a long time before moving over to Microsoft.  While he wasn’t the only one, people put the blame of the early Xbox One issues on him.  He became the face of the lame duck of the early release of Xbox One.  And, one of the reasons Sony trolled Xbox for its problems.   

From Attack of the Fanboy,  ((To say that the handling of the Xbox One reveal was botched would be putting it nicely. Mattrick created a further PR nightmare with confusing comments like “If you’re backwards compatible, you’re really backwards” or the condescending “Fortunately, we have a product for people who aren’t able to get some form of connectivity, it’s called Xbox 360.”  MS needed to clean house and Mattrick was the face of the controversy.)) 

And, Mattrick wasn’t the only one being a dick to the loyal Xbox fanbase.  Remember Adam “deal with it” Orthy?  Of course, the Internet launched a thousand memes on this fool too.   

In one of the strangest moves ever, Don left or got fired from Microsoft and moved to the mobile gaming company Zynga.  Zynga  

Instead of helping “Make Zynga Great Again”, he basically ran the company into the ground.  So, he “departed” from the company, with it turning out worse than he entered it.   

From CNET, (("I believe the timing is now right for me to leave as CEO and let Mark lead the company into its next chapter given his passion for the founding vision and his ability to couple our mobile progress with Zynga's unique strengths," Mattrick said in a statement.)) 

Funny how CEOs don’t get fired but leave for the next chapter.  How does one leave one of the biggest companies for a damn mobile game company?  How do you spin that as being a success?     

What is interesting is that I can’t find anything else about the dude recently.  It was as if Thanos snapped his fingers and erased Mattrick from the tech world.  What is he doing today?  Counting his Zynga stock or bragging about tearing down Xbox?   

What happened to him?   

Why does Don always look like you've left him out in the sun too long?  It looks like he is melting.