GI Joe: Retaliation: Pushed back to 2013 (yikes, nine months)

GI Joe: Retaliation: Pushed back to 2013 (yikes, nine months)

From LA Times, ((Paramount Pictures has delayed the release of its sole summer action movie,"G.I. Joe: Retaliation,"from June 29 until March of next year, an unexpected shift that leaves the studio without a big-budget "tentpole" hitting theaters in 2012. ))

That was a pretty ballsy move considering that they promoted the hell out of this movie and the trailer made the movie out to be pretty slick and cool. People were actually looking forward to this movie it seems. Out of nowhere, they pull their biggest movie from the summer lineup?

Something is not right about this. Now, Paramount did give a reason...kind of.

From LA Times, ((Paramount decided to delay "G.I. Joe" to convert it to 3-D, said a person close to the studio who was not authorized to be identified discussing the matter publicly. The conversion could help to boost box-office receipts for "Retaliation," particularly overseas, but such a decision is typically made far earlier in the production process. ))

Given that Battleship (another Hasbro project) has done better overseas than in North America might have something to do with that too. Plus, boosting the Box Office with unnecessary 3D prices will help them also. 3D prices are a little higher overseas than in the states.  Plus, overseas crowds are more forgiving to dumb Hollywood movies.  

Yet, there might be a bigger reason for the change in release dates. That being Channing Tatum. The trailers clearly show that Tatum's Duke character is supposed to die. Test audiences hated that their relationship wasn't bigger. And, it does seem odd that they would kill off Duke when he was the main star in the first movie.

The studio is beefing up Tatum's parts, but something tells me they'll add him into ending somehow by having him survive. Duke was supposed to die in the animated movie back in the 80s too, but they changed it at the last moment. Duke even showed up a few times in the DiC series, which is set after the animated GI Joe movie.

I find it funny that history is repeating itself with the death of the Duke Character. Moviefone has a great story detailing the same issues I brought up about Duke dying in both movies only to have him brought back.

JW and magic?

Don’t play with magical toys…enjoy

I’ve had a few friends that were JWs like this and there is a lot of truth to what they believe in this video. 

What did we learn from this video?  Throw away your toys?  That this form of CGI is very creepy? 

I personally don't have a problem with them, because they are not even close to being annoying like the Scientology folks.  They mostly keep to themselves.  I just find some of their beliefs strange, but they don't have strange groups like the Squirrel Busters.

Stay Alive (remember this movie?)

Stay Alive (remember this movie?)

A video game that kills you after you play it.  Sound familiar?  You can get the same outcome playing Superman 64.  

No one remembers this movie.  Bascially, you throw “The Ring” and “Grandma’s Boy” into a blender and you get this.  It was a teen horror film with a PG13 rating, so you know it will be shit.  

What is wrong with this dude?

What is wrong with this dude?

Is he high or drunk?

I also like that different groups of people pushed him around. At one point, he just sits there after getting his ass kicked.

The best part is Yellow Shirt Man punches him out and then drags him to shade. That's pretty nice of him.

When he wakes up, do you think he's going to wonder why his head hurts?

Also, a commenter mentioned the verb “Amber Lamps” when describing the reactions from the other people.

  

Random Things

Random Things

~Poop Story: I was riding my bike and went to a local park. I went to the public restroom to take a pee. I went to the stall alcove and noticed a pile of turds sitting on the floor. The stack of human poop sat right in front of the standing-stall. So, someone took a poop and carefully left it in front of the stall on purpose. They didn't take a poop in the toilet but on the floor. Why did they do this? The person isn't hiding in a stall waiting for the reactions. What's the point? Were they proud of their work after taking a shit on the floor? I just want to know. The poop was gone the next day, so some sorry sap had to hose it off.

~Noisy pop-up videos: I am starting to notice more and more website forcing noisy video ads popping up loudly as I try to read a web page. Shouldn't there be an auto-mute? I don't like things blaring at me as I try to read about something. It just kills the mood. It used to be just the porn sites that did this (and they still do), but now every news site seems to do this too. It reminds me of those old Myspace days when some a-hole forced you to listen to Creed loudly, and you had to scramble to find the off-switch.

~I find it ironic that Britney Spears is now a talent judge on X-Factor. She spent most of her career lip syncing on live shows, and she doesn't have a real singing range. J-Lo is a judge on another talent show involving singing and she isn't a great singer either.

~Star Wars Galaxies: I remember this SW online game. I guess it ran out of steam. It lasted from 2003 to 2011. I guess that is pretty good for an Online RPG. But, FFXI is still running today. FFXI started way back in 2002.

~Then you have The Matrix Online that ran from 2005 to 2009. Some people actually chronicled the ending of the severs. This another game that ran out steam. I remember the directors from the movies actually wrote stories for the game and these stories pushed the Matrix story forward. I guess even they lost interest after that. Watching the last video in the video chronicle seems a bit sad because these people will never have those severs anymore.

  

Shake It Bake It Booty Quake It

Uh, this was on Cartoon Network (Shake It Bake It Booty Quake It)

Holy Crap, I know that CN let’s a lot of things go, but this was pretty realistic for a cartoon show.  If some girl did that for me, I’d do her homework for her.  I’m not complaining, but was this for little kids or teenagers or grownups? 

Is this normal behavior in High School? 

Are you trying to seduce me?

The show was called Sym-Bionic Titan from Genndy Tartakovsky.  (Dexter’s Lab Powerpuff Girls and so on)  So, it sort of makes sense that a scene like this would be in there. 

From Wiki (( In the episode "Lessons in Love", Kimmy went to the Lunis' house to study under Newton's aid, as she had received an F on a math test but was given a chance to make up her grade, otherwise she would be kicked off the cheerleading squad. Throughout the episode, Kimmy finds studying under Newton difficult and tries to simply have him do her test for her (including an unsuccessful attempt to seduce Octus), which Newton ultimately denied even after her provocative dance routine. Saying that everyone has a role to play in the social life, Kimmy tried to convince herself and Newton that she was the stupid type, but Newton explained that all she had to do was dedicate herself to her work like she does with cheerleading, and it would all become clear.  ))

I am surprised some Parents’ groups didn't try to ban this show after this scene. There was some talk about it though it seems.

Anyway, the show only lasted one season. A real shame because I might have gotten into it.  But, I am shocked they got away with this.  More power to them. 

Men in Black 3 (Review Part 1 of 2)

 Men in Black 3

This movie is in some ways a “we’re sorry for MIB2”.  This new MIB movie is everything we loved about the first movie in terms of tone and humor.  Gone are the hundreds of product placements shots and lame animal jokes.  We’re back to the focus of the partnership between Agents K and J.  Plus, you can throw in some interesting time travel and alt-timeline elements that I found very fun to watch and unfold.  The movie certainly pulled back from the silliness of the second movie and that’s a good thing.  The movie is very fun this time around with some serious elements thrown in at the end. 

This time around they added the wrinkle of time travel to the world of MIB.  Despite some missteps with time travel plot holes; they do a really good job with the time elements. 

Some bad things happen to Agent K and he is wiped from the timeline.  J is the only one to discover this and has to change it or literally the entire world will be wiped out.  J has to convince young K he is from the future.

The movie is a direct sequel to the first movie and almost completely ignores the second movie altogether.  Watching MIB3 will help you admire the first movie even more, especially K’s involvement with J’s recruitment.  It all comes back around to their first meeting in the first movie with this story and this movie gives that meeting a whole different spin after watching this new movie. 

Boris the Animal is the main villain this time around.  (Actually, there are two Boris-es.) Jemaine (Conchords) Clement plays Boris fairly well and is clearly a throwback to Vincent D'Onofrio’s Edgar character.  Boris is just as disgusting as Edgar because he has mini-bug parts of himself that detach and kill people.  I just wish there was more of him in the story.  I think there are a lot of scenes on the cutting room floor.  And, that’s only a minor gripe.

The main focus of the movie is squarely on the relationship between J and K.  I love the notion that friendships can last and begin through different time periods.  The young K, played masterfully by Josh Brolin, really does bond with J even on a different level than the one from the present.  It is the interaction between Brolin and Smith that make this movie shine. 

Much of the praise has to go to the director Barry Sonnenfeld.  Where as he screwed up the second movie, Barry shows restraint without making the movie feel boring this time around.  Because it isn’t as goofy and flashy, I think the movie won’t be a box office hit like the first two movies.  Plus, the budget for this movie went out of control with some saying it is as high as 300 million dollars. 

There are some funny Sonnenfeld moments throughout.  Yet, there are some nice emotional scenes sprinkled in here and there that makes this more than a silly summer action movie.

On the negative side, Danny Elfman’s score is rather boring and bland.  I truly hated the lazy rock version of the MIB theme at the beginning and it takes me out of the movie.  Elfman is really phoning it in for this one.  He knows how to make some good scores like the Spiderman series, but he recently doesn’t seem to care as much.  And, don’t get me started with the Pitbull song, which is down right shitty. 

Notes

-They really went out of their way not to have many of the silly side characters from the second movie.

-The talking wall art character from the trailer is not in the movie.  Can we say deleted scene?

End of Part 1…

That's My Boy posters...make me dumber.

 That's My Boy posters...make me dumber.

Somehow, these really bad posters make me feel even worst for the movie. However, can this Adam Sandler movie reach to new lows as Jack and Jill? Look at how badly they're photo-shopped.   

By the way, I love the poorly drawn in beer in the photo above, and the fake pouring effects.  Did a teenager create these?  Better yet, Perez Hilton? 

 An 80's joke in an Adam Sandler movie?  How original.  

______________________________________________________________________

Everything about this one is bad.  Adam is pasted onto a completely different person's body...with a different skin tone.  You're not even trying.  Samberg is surrounded by fake bowling pins and not in the same shot as Ice Ice Baby.  

Dude, what is with the Spam lately?

Dude, what is with the Spam lately?

I've been getting a lot of spam recently. I've probably deleted about 20 comment spam posts in the past three weeks. I haven't seen this much spam on my blog since the early days of 2005 and 2007.

Some of them will post a generic comment and leave a (…) with a link to a spam post. Other spam posts will be related to a post by putting a spam link to the subject like MIB sunglasses or Ice Cream. The spammers also leave tiny links in a period so you won't find it.

Given the age of Twitter, you would think comment spam for blogs would be old school. 2005 was the height of this comment spam, it just seems silly now.

For anyone else having problems with spamming here are some old school tips. I use the comment page on blogger to catch them.   

Hipsters, forget skinny jeans.  Start wearing spam outfits.  

Donna Summer RIP

Donna Summer RIP

Sad news from a few days ago. We lost an amazing singer in the form of Donna Summer. From New York Times ((Donna Summer, the multimillion-selling singer and songwriter whose hits captured both the giddy hedonism of the 1970s disco era and the feisty female solidarity of the early 1980s, died on Thursday at her home in Naples, Fla. She was 63. ))

Probably one of my favorite songs from her disco era has to be Bad Girls. Here's the extended version of her song. (Toot-Toot-Hey-Beep-Beep)

DJ Hero 2 version (Love Lockdown)

Yes, this is a disco song about hookers and their horrible lives. And, we get to dance to this sad story in clubs and skating rings. What I always amazing is that Summer’s early songs were very sexual in nature.   She got very religious in her later years, and yet there were always these sexual songs like Love To Love You Baby (all 17 minutes of her having orgasms).  I guess you can’t forget things like that.  She had a very sexual and powerful voice.

She also was important to artists like Whitney Houston. While Houston never went as far as Summer with sexual songs, the strong voice was there.

Donna drew some controversy when she got older and more religious. She got into trouble for some gay comments involving AIDS, and later claimed she didn't say those things. She also asked TLC to remove her samples from their song  I'm Good At Being Bad. Rumors were that Donna felt the song was too dirty. (Coming from the woman that sung the song Love to Love You)

Love to love you (extended version)

Listen to those strings, now that is music! Also, Digital Underground sampled this track in their popular song Freaks of the Industry. 

You will be missed Donna (toot-toot-beep-beep)

Heavy Metal (Nostalgia Critic review)

Heavy Metal (Nostalgia Critic review)

I remember watching this movie and being freaked out because of the countless shots of nudity.  I believe every female character gets naked in it.  Now, you can’t go anywhere on the Internet without promotions for cartoon nudity. 

It was a cartoon movie with a lot of violence in it too.  Now, it is clear the movie is pure fan-service and not much else.  But, I still like the movie…on a campy Cool World sort of way.   

I also remember liking the different styles of animation throughout the stories too.  As far as the interconnecting stories, they don’t make much sense altogether.  Tales from the Hood and Cat’s Eye did a better job of interconnecting short stories than Heavy Metal. 

Notes

- John Candy:  I forgot that he played such a huge role in many of the segments with different characters. 

-Loc-Nar:  The green marble thingy; is in most of the stories in one manner or another.

-I still get a kick out of “Major Boobage” from South Park.  It pays total tribute to Heavy Metal.  I also read that Stone and Parker hate Heavy Metal, but they captured the essence of the movie.

 -You can watch the "not as good" HM 2 on YouTube.  

Brand New Google Doodle

Brand New Google Doodle

Just go to your Google page and play around with it.  It seems to be a large range of things to play with the keyboard.  The page is in celebration of the late creator of the Moog Synthesizer (Not to be confused with a Moogle from Final Fantasy). 

From CS Monitor, ((Google is using their homepage today to celebrate what would have been the 78th birthday of Robert "Bob" Moog, the inventor of the eponymous Moog synthesizer,  an electronic musical instrument that would change the sound of popular music forever. ))

Without him, there wouldn't other people inventing instruments like the Blaster Beam. Moog created his own version of the Theremin also. From Wiki, ((Moog constructed his own theremin as early as 1948. Later he described a theremin in the hobbyist magazine Electronics World and offered a kit of parts for the construction of theElectronic World's Theremin, which became very successful. In the late 1980s Moog repaired the original theremin of Clara Rockmore, an accomplishment which he considered a high point of his professional career.  ))

Hot Lists again

Since I rant and rave about Hot Lists all the time. I'm all about rating the hottest and cutest women. Maxim has their recent list out there.

The list is far better than most. 

Here are my thoughts on a few on the list.

1 Bar Refaeli:  I have no idea who she is and I won’t even bother Googling her.  Why is she number one? 

2  Olivia Munn:  Oh, I like her a lot, but is she really number two material?  Maybe 5-10 years ago. 

3  Mila Kunis:  I kind of lump her in with those cute girls around the way like Emma Stone and Olivia Wilde.  Both of them are on the list.  I can see them being ranked high.  I have no problem with that. 

8 Megan Fox:  Why is she on this list?  Okay she is hot, despite her mutant thumb, but she doesn’t have that “cute” factor either. 

15 Kristen Stewart:  Wow, really?  There is nothing appealing about her in the least.  She is toast with the butter. 

17 Scarlett Johansson:  She would be higher on the list.  I am sorry but there is no reason to have Kristen above this bombshell.  She spends most of the Avengers in a skintight outfit. 

20  Jennifer Love Hewitt:  I am sorry, but she needs to be higher on the list too.  I’ve had a huge crush on her for years.  “What are you waiting for?”

23  Anne Hathaway:  She’s a pretty woman and needs to be moved upward. 

26  Taylor Swift:  She isn’t exactly that hot. 

Men in Black 3: Early word?

Men in Black 3: Early word?

MIB3 is at 70%on Rotten Tomatoes. As more reviews start to roll in, we could see it dip to rotten. Right now, it is fresh. Even if this movie is good, there is one thing holding it back. MIB2. MIB2 stunk up the place so much that even normal people are a little weary of seeing this new one. The first movie is still a classic, but the second movie really hurts that shine on the first movie. Everything good about the first one seems to have been thrown out for the second one.

And, the worst thing about the second movie is still all product placement in the damn MIB HQ.

Oh, and Johnny Knoxville. Knoxville, really?

MIB 2 got a 38%, so part 3 has a lot a way to go to reach that low.

Also did you know that hasn't done a movie for three years?

Is that Lady Gaga in the trailer?

Error 37: Diablo III the new Mass Effect III

Error 37: Diablo III the new Mass Effect III

Fanboys are pissed, and this time they might have a point. I was reading the amusing post on Cracked.com and I feel their pain. But, back in my hardcore gaming days, games like Superman 64 had these sort of problems.

I haven't seen this much nerd rage sense gamers hated the ending to ME3. There has been so much outrage over the fatal errors that Blizzard had to make a statement. This time around the fanboys have a rightful grip. If you can't play the game because of faulty software, what's the point? Plus, game companies have to consider how fast negative word on street flows through the Twitter/Facebook/Blogger world. People no longer have to wait to read about it in their Lamepro (Gamepro).

The geeks rule the Earth now.

At this moment, there are so many Errors, that you need a flow chart just to keep up with them.

Some of the best things about this is reading the meme pictures around the web. Very funny.

Community Showrunner (Dan Harmon) fired…

Community Showrunner (Dan Harmon) fired…

First off, I love Community and l really love the writing too.  Dan Harmon has had his feuds, but firing him in the manner they did just seems strange to me.  Did he burn too many bridges?

Dan talked about it on his Tumblr page, and it makes me feel bad for him, despite the fact Sony still has to pay him for doing nothing (Creative Consultant).  And, that’s a nice payback.  However, where does this leave the show Community? 

We all know that a showrunner is very important to the voice and feel of a show and the direction and style is spearheaded by the person in charge.  It is also important to note that Harmon is also the creator of the show.  No matter what the studio and the network say, there will be a difference in the way the show turns out. 

I also find it strange that they would fire him after NBC renewed the show for a 4^th season. 

Somewhere, that fat loser Chevy Chase is laughing his ass off at this news.  And, I don’t like that one bit. 

Will Smith gets a little slap-happy with a reporter (Big Willie Style)

Will Smith gets a little slap-happy with a reporter

Well, it is the “Willennium”.

I've disagreed with Will Smith in the past (IE Space Church), but I have to side with him on this reaction. If any guy tried to kiss or hug me without my permission (not that I would give it), I'd react in a similar manner. You don't try to kiss someone without their permission.

Just you wait. There will be twitter posts and stories about Will Smith being anti-gay with his reaction. This is not the case. It is a reaction anyone would have to this. Maybe the guy really liked MIB 2 and Wild Wild West?

And, calling it an attack is a bit much, news sites. One site calls it “Will Smith Violently Attacks Reporter for Trying to Kiss His Cheek”. You're just trying to make it a controversy.

From People, (("What the hell is your problem?" says Smith, who then pushes and slaps at the amorous journalist. 
Smith laughs about it and tells another reporter down the line, "He tried to kiss me on the mouth. He's lucky I didn't try to sucker punch him. ... Sorry, I said that on camera." ))

The guy that attempted the drive-by kissing is named Vitalii Sediuk. He's kind of known for this crap. Careful, Vitalii, you don't want Will to sick Xenu or Tom Cruise on you. 

DOA: Dead or Alive, more thoughts

Zack:  "You're that girl from that My Name is Earl?"

DOA: Dead or Alive

While I disagree with the reviewer, I do like the eye candy in the film. All the women are extremely hot and very fit. While they aren't as “bouncy” as the character models in the games, they are very attractive. However, the movie is stupid...very Street Fighter stupid. There are things in here that really annoy me.

The only reason to see the movie is for the T&A...just like the game. I am not complaining about that, but I just wanted to point that out.

I've already reviewed the film, but I am too lazy to look for it.  

Notes

~Jaime Pressly:She has never looked better. I mean she looks amazing with a tight body. While the movie is really bad, she puts in her all in it. Btw, she just made my “hot list”.

~Kasumi : She is my favorite character from the games, but I felt Devon Aoki was not right for the part. I always viewed Kasumi as being a “rounder” filled out kind of women. I wouldn't kick Aoki out of bed, but she wasn't Kasumi.

~Eric Roberts : Way to ham it up, ER. Does the man have a dimmer switch?

~Kevin Nash as Bass Armstrong : That is kind of funny that Kevin Nash is playing a clear copy of Hulk Hogan. He was also a founding member of the New World Order with Hulk Hogan for a while (and the wolfpack)

-Zack AKA Dennis Rodman: This character is sooo 90s. Rodman provided the voice to the character in one of the volleyball games. There was a time when you couldn't get away from Rodman. He had a few TV shows and a hand full of movies, and his character-likeness in DOA. Now, you can only find him on rehab shows.

Aren't you sick of me yet?

Booty Pop: Fake butt pads...

Booty Pop: Fake butt pads...

People of the world, are we so self-obsessed that we need products like this to make us feel better? I can't say it is just women that are into products like this one. Remember all those hair club for men ads? Being a red-blooded guy, I'd be more than a little pissed if I discovered that She was not only wearing a padded bra, but also a padded ass too.  That's like taking home a Happy Meal and discovering that there was no toy in the box.  

I remember when having a round ass and full lips were considered bad. Now, everyone wants a rounder ass, bigger breasts, darker complexion and fuller lips. You see where I am going with this right? These were things I was into before it got popular.

Braid, music

Braid: Downstream

This track is probably my favorite out of the game. I know it wasn't written for the game, but licensed (to kill?) for it. It gives the game a slightly different feel from the Super Mario Brothers games.

I also like Lullaby Set.

I guess it is the point that these songs are in a platform game.  

So, Earth really has two moons?

So, Earth really has two moons?

I looked it up. The rock is named Cruithne. From Wiki, (( It has been incorrectly called "Earth's second moon", but it is aquasi-satellite[2], not a moon. Cruithne does not orbit Earth, and at times it is on the other side of the Sun.[3] Its orbit takes it inwards towards the orbit of Mercury, and outside the orbit of Mars.[3] Cruithne orbits the Sun in about 1 year, but it takes 770 years for the series to complete a horseshoe-shaped movement, with the Earth in the gap of the horseshoe. ))

So, they are wrong. It is incorrectly called a moon. It is just one of those guys that shows up late to a party with more beer more than anything else.

I also looked around the WWW and found this story. From Universe Today, ((Of course, it would be a very small moon. Perhaps no more than a meter across. But a moon nonetheless. And there could even be others – many others – much smaller than that. Little bits of solar system leftovers, orbiting our planet even farther out than the Moon we all know and love, coming and going in short-lived flings with Earth without anyone even knowing. ))

Herbie Fully Loaded (And the Herbie series)

Herbie Fully Loaded (And the Herbie series)

I've never seen this movie, despite all the bad reviews. 

-Did you notice how clean and you Lindsey Lohan looks in the clips?

-Was there any continuity between the Herbie movies? I remember watching Herbie Goes Bananas and remember it not having a connection the last one.

-Jimmi Simpson is in this movie? WTF, the guy from Breakout Kings?

I used watch all the old Herbie movies back in the day with my brother. And, they were made for kids and I had fun watching them. I am not sure they would hold up today, but I am willing to watch them again.

CSI Miami canceled, Miami style (Yeah!!!)

CSI Miami canceled, Miami style (Yeah!!!)

I never understood why any of these CSI shows were so popular? I tried sitting down and watching them and a few times and found myself bored with the shows. I also can't believe people tune in to watch such bland characters. I felt it was too much science and not enough character development. (That was part of the problem I had with Breakout Kings, because I felt the character development was weak, but the second season was much better this year.)

From LA Times ((In a statement Sunday morning, the network said: "'CSI: Miami' leaves an amazing television legacy — a signature look and style, global popularity and as a key player in CBS’ rise to the top over the past decade. We thank all the producers — led by Jerry Bruckheimer, Jonathan Littman and Ann Donahue — and its talented cast, led by David Caruso, for 10 outstanding seasons. Viewers around the world will continue to enjoy rebroadcasts of 'CSI: Miami' in syndication and on key digital platforms for many years to come." ))

Ten seasons is enough I guess. I guess Caruso can go back to that lackluster movie career. Jade II here we come!

But I did like the stupid one-liners.

  

Throwing hot Coffee on Clerk, keep it classy...

 Throwing hot Coffee on Clerk, keep it classy...

From Philadelphia CBS, ((Lt. Ray Evers with the Philadelphia Police Department added, “This is a disagreement over $2.40 and you’re going to injure someone for the rest of their lives. If you can’t resolve conflicts in a proper way you really should not be on the streets.” ))

While I think people pay too much for coffee anyway, 2.40 isn't a reason to throw hot coffee at a clerk working a shitty job. They don't get paid enough for that shit. And, now the police have ID the coffee thrower and know where he lives.

Just pay the extra 2 bucks if you have to. Now, your life is pretty much f'ed. Enjoy.