Thursday, December 12, 2024

Look, it's PAC-MAN! Waka waka



Like most of the time, I was having a bad day, but this video made me laugh.  I like mean humor, and I like some trolling here and there.  I love that this guy is walking around causing random havoc for no other reason but for his own pleasure.  The best part is that the kid is rolling around like a drunk dog and squealing like a pig.  

Brilliant I say.  


Monday, December 09, 2024

Naked Gun: All Police squad intros



The Naked Gun series is one of my favorite comedy series out there.  I hate the stuffy shit like all those boring Woody Allen movies.  I’ll take a Leslie Nielsen movie over that shit. And, F' Woody Allen for good measure.

Anyway, one of the staples of the series is the crazy opening credit 

In the first one, you can see the shadow of the camera rig as it enters the house.  The locker room and the donuts shop are funny bits.  You can even hear the bell on the tire wire when it enters the scene.  

The second one has a different version of the theme song, which is in a lower key than the first.  I love the bumper car bit. The extras are having a lot of fun with it.  This compilation cuts out the funniest bit from the second movie.  It is the Zsa Zsa Gabor cameo.  She gets pulled over by the Naked Gun credits.  I’ve never seen the actual opening credits pull someone over before.  Zsa Zsa got pulled over by some cops, and she slapped them in real life.  I love that she was willing to spoof herself in this movie, meaning she was in on the joke.  You don't get that with today’s celebrities.  



For the third one, the SW and Jurassic Park references are cool.  The Star Wars one was an official one, but I don't think the JP one was.  Lucas permitted them to use the actual footage.  He’s credited in the credits.  


Sunday, December 01, 2024

Lil Xan: Who is the F' is this a-hole?




I saw this story on Reddit.  I have no idea who this Little Xan is.  I tried to listen to this mumbling meth-head wannabe “rapper”.  I can't get through a single song.  If this is what modern rap sounds like, count me out.  I hate how the rap and hip hop stars fought so hard to be seen as legit musicians and these young mumble/marble-mouth rappers just go on stage and shit this stuff off.  What happened to music?  What happened to this new music genre?  

What is up with the skinny jeans, the bad face tattoos, and the sleepy expression?  Why is this the uniform for all these mumble rappers?  

Anyway, being the piece of shit skinny white trash that he is, Xan kicked and attacked a fan at some stupid concert.  However, the security guard did slam the skinny little prick.  The police are looking for this goblin and he’s gone into hiding.  I hope I don’t have to write about this guy again.  F’ him and his style of rap.  





Friday, November 29, 2024

Was this a banned Nike ad?




I have no idea if this was a legit proposal for a Nike commercial, but I have to say it is pretty ballsy to make it.  The sound and visuals make you think of something darker.  However, it turns out it is just someone trying harder to lose weight. 


The Young Guns Series : Two Classic Westerns That Need More Love


Remember that scene where Charley Bowdre stayed with that hooker?  There was an extra scene where we would have discovered that the prostitute was Charley’s mother.  He knew she was his mother and just wanted her to hold him, given that he had never seen her.  He believes he is going to die and wants to maintain his long-lost mother one first and final time.  I think they should have kept this scene in and would have added a darker element to the movie.  

From TV Tropes, ((Deleted Scene: In the DVD Commentary Casey Siemaszko reveals the prostitute Charlie goes to see was actually a longer scene, and the end of the scene he tells the guys the woman was his mother.))

It is a real shame they never bothered adding this scene because it shows the growth.   


Friday, November 15, 2024

Mr. Short Term Memory Visits the Hospital - SNL: A short essay



Given this skit happened in 1990, I believe I was in middle school.  

I love how memories work, pun intended.  Certain pop culture moments are connected to your past. I was a super geek, guaranteed that girls would never talk to me.  I hated attending school because I didn't fit in with the “cool kids”. At one point in my life, I decided to go my path.  I dressed and acted the way I wanted to.  I collected a few nerdy outsider friends as well.  We’d talk about VGs and Star Trek.  One of the nerdier things we’d discuss was the episodes of SNL.  From 10 to 21, SNL was in my life.  

Anyway, there was a rather butch girl named Betty.  She was tall, chunky, and unattractive.  She and I had a few clashes because she was a low-effort bully.  Because her life wasn't great, she found pleasure in being an asshole to everyone that didn’t fit the norm.  I think she hated me the most because I refused to change.  She never touched me or beat me up, but she used to make fun of me all the time.  

I sat in the bus seat with my friend Joey and we’d talk about the various geeky shows we watched on the weekend.  Furthermore, I talked about this skit “The Short Term Memory Guy”.  I remember acting it out, even doing the Tom Hanks voice. 

Behind me, I heard Betty asking one of the cool kids what I was talking about.  So, he mockingly repeated my nerdy story. So, Tom Hanks did a skit, mockingly doing a silly voice, on a show.  In return, I mocked Tom Hanks's mocking voice retelling the skit.  From there, one of the cool kids mocked me, mocking Tom Hanks's mocking voice.  We have a mocking inception here.  

I heard the whole thing.  At the time, I was a little hurt by this and got a little angry.  Why did they care about the geeky shit Joey and I discussed? Why would they intently listen to our conversation? Who cares?   

What was the point of this story? 

One of the things I’ve been known for today is telling good stories, both written and verbal.  I get into the story with voices and gestures, kind of like that skit. I give zero f’s if people mock them.  I am more comfortable in my skin to care what the “cool kids” think.  

This all came about due to this not-so-funny skit. 


Thursday, November 14, 2024

High Anxiety- Window Scene Breaking the 4th wall or window.



This is simply the best scene in the movie.  I love that the camera is zooming in too fast and crashing through the window.  The characters look back in shock as the camera quietly backs out, embarrassed.  As someone was work stated, it is an actual fourth wall break. 


Deep Blue Sea False or Decoy protagonist





When people saw this in the theater, they laughed, cheered, and clapped. This was the moment after Samuel Jackson's rousing speech when people were supposed to come together and work out a solution to a problem.  Even the score and camera pretend this was that heroic moment.  As we zoom in, the shark shows up right on cue to dash our hopes.  Even the characters in the scene are destroyed by the misdirection.  Brilliant.  

That shark read the script and waited for the right moment to make its own reshoots.  

There is a growing trend of movies setting up heroes only for the movie to knock them down for greater impact.  So, what is this trope?

One of the famous tropes, of recent times, is the guy or girl we believe is the hero, but ends up dying midway through the story.  This subverts the hero we’re supposed to cheer for.  One of the best examples of this trope is Samuel Jackson making that heroic speech in Deep Blue Sea.  

Looking through the TV tropes, one can see that it is either the decoy or the false protagonist.  

From the wiki, ((In fiction, a false protagonist is a literary technique, often used to make the plot more jarring or more memorable by fooling the audience's preconceptions, that constructs a character who the audience assumes is the protagonist but is later revealed not to be.))

Scream is another movie with this trope.  Drew Barrymore was promoted as the main character in the movie only to be killed in the first ten minutes, They snatched her away from us.  Remember, Barrymore was on the movie cover and promoted it as if she was the main character.  

Metal Gear Solid 2 is another story where the game misdirects us that we're going to be playing as Snake the whole time. Nope, we only play him in the first chapter.

The other story I remember this happening was in the delightful Cabin in the Woods. Remember, Chris Hemsworth has the moment when he was supposed to "get help" only to die senselessly...by accident.








Saturday, November 09, 2024

Terms to talk about (Rizz Remix)


In the olden times of this blog, I used to go through new terms from the Internet and make fun of them.  I stopped doing it because blogs change and evolve.  However, I got bored and decided to dig this old corpse up again.  Some of the terms I looked up come from Google’s AI, while others come from the Urban Dictionary.  Just like old times.  

Doomscrolling: Doomscrolling is the act of spending too much time reading negative news or other content online that makes you feel sad, anxious, or angry. It can be harmful to your mental health.

In the past, I used to do a lot of Doomscrolling, but I don’t do it as much.  When things are too gloomy, I just go elsewhere on the Internet.  I move on.  As I have gotten older, I tend not to waste my time with harsh depressing news.  I didn’t Doomscroll the news about Trump and I simply will just move on with my life. I do more Pornscrolling…

Chillax:  "Chillax" is a slang term that means to relax or calm down. It's a combination of the words "chill" and "relax". Here are some examples of "chilax" in a sentence:

I hate this word.  I can’t stand it, but it is a proper term today.  It is a hipster term.  

Rizz:  “Rizz” is a slang term that describes someone's ability to attract people, often romantically or sexually. It can be used as a noun or a verb, for example, “to rizz up” means to attract, seduce, or chat up someone.

Rizz is the one word that perplexes me the most.  I kept hearing about it until I asked some 20-somethings.  So, it comes from the word charisma.  Are we so lazy that we can't even say the “Char” at the beginning of a word?  Is there a shortage of syllables for young people that they must chop it down to four letters?  I thought my generation was into adding “Z”s to words.  The more rizz you have the more ladies you can get.  I, for one, have NO rizz.  Never will.  

Echo Bunker: An "echo bunker" refers to an extremely isolated echo chamber, where information and viewpoints that contradict the dominant opinion within the group are completely blocked out, making it impossible for any opposing truths to penetrate or be considered, essentially creating a completely sealed off space for a single perspective.

This is what the Internet has become.  Think of Twitter where people block away one that has a different opinion than yours.  Discord is another site just like it. Discord might be worse.    




Jim Rauch has passed on.


Jim was one of those legendary TCAP predators. He worked for the University of Cincinnati. He was into music and liked to talk a lot—I mean, he loved to talk!  Jim had a lot of history and honors, but he threw it all away.  

When you watch his two-hour integration, he experiences a wide range of emotions and stories. The arrest happened in Highland Heights, Kentucky, near the Cincinnati border. Chris Hansen never interviewed him, though the cameras caught him being handcuffed. Remember that Jim rolled around Ohio and Kentucky drunk, looking for the decoy. He said and showed some nasty things to the decoy, too.  

Jim was an angry blowhard who thought he was smarter than the detectives interviewing him.  However, he dug his grave by talking to the cops without a lawyer.  The entire interview is an amusing journey through his life.  Due to most of his police footage being released, he became an Internet legend.  There are prank calls and analysts of this guy out there.  Since he was a boomer, he wasn’t aware of his Internet fame.  We know this because Jim had someone called his house and talked to him.  

He succumbed to his long-term illnesses and passed away in October. He’s brought many laughs, but time has passed, and I can’t feel bad for him. 


Thursday, October 31, 2024

Revisiting The Channel Awesome Document



I found this dude on a KF page.  

This commentary is very good.  I used to like and respect the Channel Awesome crew.  When I was younger, I wanted to be like these guys.  As I have gotten older, I have seen them as entitled and out of touch with reality.  These kids who got out of high school made it big in the salad days of the Internet.   While flawed, CA did bring some attention to these reviewers.  They would come around and attack the very site that helped them become Internet famous.  

A great many of these guys never had a real, butt-kicking job, so the old CA document seems petty and foolish.  These CA content creators needed to get their hands dirty with real jobs to be thankful for the great jobs they had during the golden years of the Internet.  

As I have gotten to more about many of these former CA, I find them to be annoying.  I think it has more to do with social media.  Even when their fame is waning, they look down upon getting a real job. We all have to do it.

Remember Spoony.

Side Note: My favorite entitled former CA member is Film Brain.  I liked his negative reviews, but he’s changed into a more positive reviewer and moved away from what made him amusing, funny, and popular.  His old videos were getting between 90-150K, and now they are between 2-9K views.  It reminds me of my shitty ass blog.  This blog was getting crazy numbers in the 2000s.  Good thing I didn’t make this my living.  Right, Film Brain?  


Tuesday, October 29, 2024

Die hard 3| Water Jug Puzzle


At work, I mentioned the water jug puzzle from Die Hard: With a Vengeance.  It was one of those puzzles that I could not figure out even after the scene.  We discussed it and came up with the solution after the time limit.  This scene is one of the reasons I love Die Hard 3 so much.  

The movie wasn’t supposed to be a Die Hard movie.  Jonathan Hensleigh wrote the script Simon Says as a standalone movie.  Wanting to go in a different direction, they commissioned the script for the Die Hard franchise, with some major changes to the second and third acts.  When you go back and watch DH3, please take notice of the tone shift after the explosion in the subway.  The movie goes from a mystery thriller to a full-blown Die Hard movie.  It even reveals its connections to the first movie. 





Friday, October 25, 2024

Tina Peters 2 of 2



Why throw away your entire life over a lie  

County Clerk in a county in Colorado.  There was an audit done in her county and no issues were reported.  She started to believe there were problems with the voting machines and took it upon herself to look into matters.  In stealth mode, she brought in a spy to copy hard drives and other information.  Get this, when it happened, she ordered the cameras to be turned off during the heist.  

She let a former pro-surfer/CEO into the building to record and copy sensitive documents.  Yes, she brought in a former surfer for a heist.  The data ended up on the Internet with passwords and names.  In this orgy of stupidity, the fellow clown, My Pillow CEO, is mixed into this mess.  

During her sentencing, she went completely off the rails. You have to see that video because she talks more about the fake votes than about herself. Despite the facts, she still believes she is a hero.  

While she is sentenced to nine years, I don’t think she will be there that long.  Plus, she will attempt to do right-wing interviews and podcasts in prison.  Trust me, grifters are sweeping for her.  The best part is that she is going to a state prison and not a federal prison.  That means she can get a pardon from Trump if he gets re-elected.  


 
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