Sinéad
O'Connor wants to have sex...please apply
While
listening to Hollywood Babble On, they mentioned a strange story
about O'Connor (nothing compares to you) singer making an online plea
for sex. I didn't want to believe it, but it seems true enough.
At
first she claimed she was lesbian and now Bi-sexual. Make up your
mind. And, earlier than that she was ordained as a priest in the
Irish Orthodox and Apostolic Church. Something tells me she isn't
much into the priesthood as of today, because she is one horny lady.
From
Daily Mail, (('My
s**t-uation sexually/affectionately speaking is so dire that
inanimate objects are starting to look good as are inappropriate
and/or unavailable men and/or inappropriate and/or unavailable fruits
and vegetables.'
'Needless
to say what I do for a living makes it hard for me to find men that
only want me cuz they like my (legendary) a**e.
'Yet
I am in the peak of my sexual prime and way too lovely to be living
like a nun. and it's VERY depressing.'))
At
first, I remembered that she was a pretty good looking, if annoying,
woman back in the day. Why would she have to make online pleas for
sexual favors? Then, I saw these pictures of her.
It
all made sense then. But, you know what? I'll take one for the
team. I'm willing to put my name up for her list.
Here
are a few of her “requirements”
He
must be no younger than 44:
I can't help you there. You would think she'd take anyone around
18-60. Kind of strange, but okay.
Must
be living in Ireland but I don't care if he is from the planet Zog:
What about Xenu? I can't even used Irish Spring without breaking
out, let alone live in Ireland. But, I would like to visit.
Must
not be named Brian or Nigel:
Last time I checked, I wasn't named either of those.
Must
be blind enough to think I'm gorgeous:
Well, my eyesight isn't that good. If I squint enough, I could see
Sinéad O'Connor from the 80s and 90s.
Has
to be employed. Am not fussy in what capacity generally but vehicle
clampers need not apply:
Vehicle clampers? Is that some sexual device I am not aware of?
Leather
trouser- wearing gardai, fire-men, rugby players, and Robert
Downey-Junior will
be given special consideration. As will literally anyone who
applies.":
Well, I am not Iron Man, and I don't wear leather trousers, but I do
have a long black...leather jacket...for real.
I
like me a hairy man so buffed and/or waxed need not apply:
Well, I can't help you there. I am mostly hairless. Honest.
Well,
I don't really fit her needs, but I guess something can be worked
out. Did I mention I like to rip up pictures of religious figures on
TV?
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