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Star Wars Episode VII teaser Well, you knew I had to talk about it! Okay, you have me hook, line and sinker, JJ. I am really looking forward to this movie. It feels like a cross between the prequels and the sequels. There isn't much to the teaser, but it certainly gives a glimpse into the kind of movie it is going to be. The trailer clearly has the prequel vibe with the editing, but the designs look more sequel-ish. When you see that opening desert shot, you know you're getting a Star Wars film. From what I can tell, the two main characters will be a black guy (the storm trooper) and a woman (the woman on the hover bike).  -The Storm Trooper uniforms are a bit different and a cross between the clone troopers and the original designs. -X-Wings flying through a planet on water: Cool shot. And we get to see the updated design of the ships. -Familiar Sound Effects: We get the X-Wing and TIE Fighters sounds. The trailer has amazing sound effects....

Bullet to the Head  Sly:  "I am Da Law." This movie isn’t bad, but it isn’t good either.   This is based on a graphic novel, but it feels less polished than most movies based on printed material.   The movie really doesn’t have much style or good storytelling.   It comes across as being bland. The script needed a few more rewrites.  Sylvester Stallone plays yet another hitman with rules.   (No women, no kids…again) Someone double-crosses him and his partner, which gets his partner killed.   He is now on a warpath to get the people that want him dead with the help of a police detective. The script is simple with its lame dialogue and half-baked subplots.   It actually works as a revenge flick with a hitman and cop taking out all the people that supposedly turned on them…however the movie shifts gears in the last act.   The movie pretty much abandons it plot in the last 15 minutes and kills off most of the villains an...

The Shockmaster: Well, that was really bad... Behold, The Shockmaster incident I only discovered this little gem today on Reddit. This character was supposed to be the total badass WCW guy. The introduction went of the rails once he fell on his ass on live TV. However, it was already doomed when he donned that goofy glittered storm trooper helmet and pimp vest thingy. Why would you even bother wearing that helmet let alone glittering it up? Oh, how about the fact the Shockmaster also gestures when another wrestler is talking? And, why did he sound like Dr. Claw?    I love reactions from the wrestlers when falls on his ass. “Oh, God.” Fred Ottman was the guy behind the “mask” and he's done a few interviews about the infamous incident. Some people claim that was a form of sabotage. From Pro Wrestling Wiki.com, (( Dusty Rhodes later revealed on an episode of WWE 24/7's Legends of Wrestling that the piece of lumber previously wasn't t...

Robert (what?) First off, I don't think it is your job that is costing you female relationships. Something tells me it has to do with your name being bad homophobic word. It's like some guy being named the N-word for a last name. You might want to change that. Second, yes I know his last name is from England/France. But, in North America, this doesn't go over that well for you. From White Pages.com, (( French: from Old French fagot ‘bundle of firewood’; probably a metonymic occupational name for a gatherer or seller of firewood. )) I would love to interview this guy today. Robert, if you're reading this, I want to talk to you.   

Shia LaBeouf by Rob Cantor Maybe, this is what Shia does in his off hours? Does Shia go around hunting people? I have no idea what the hell I just watched, but I like it. Also, Shia's cameo is a reference to Orson Welles' role in Citizen Kane. After all the shit he's been through, are we at the point where we build him back up? Has he poked fun at his shit enough for us to forgive him?  I'm not sure.  

Emmanuel Lewis Interview on TV Guidance Counselor  Here's a shout out to Ken Reid and his TV Guidance Counselor podcast interview with the 80s face of sitcoms. While I watched him on the Surreal Life a few times, I never really know how this guy behaved off screen. It appears he's a nice dude that's really open about his time on TV. Unlike Gary Coleman, he was never bitter about his fame. If Coleman was still alive, you would never get this type of interview. I also love that Lewis is shocked by Ken's knowledge of the show. And, there was a lot of tension on the Webster show during that first season, which Lewis took to heart. But, the tension subsided and they all got along very well. And, yes, Lewis did do that Christmas special with Mr. T.  Lucky Bastard.  The amount of booty he got on his Webster fame alone must have been uncountable.    Together, these four 80s child stars form...super mega force squad. ___________________...

Remember that Joe Boxer ad? Call back...sort of So, the old one had fit men banging their balls around like bells to make music, which caused a lot of outcry. This year, Kmart goes for a slightly tamer version...kind of. I think they're playing it safe with this verison Here's the one from last year. I wonder what a female version of that same ad would be? Okay, I'd take the female version over the dude one. 

Terms to comment on (Urban Dictionary) My Twitter account was hacked : ((English phrase intended as a blatant lie to obscure an act of poor judgment on one's part. Originated with regard to making horrible statements on Twitter, of course, but can really be used in just about any situation and be as believable. )) Comment: I've read this one hundreds of times now. When someone really gets angry and tweets some crazy shit, they will often delete it and claim someone hacked them. I've only seen it used over the past two years though. Usually, someone will get fired over a crazy tweet or something. Can't really use this in real life. “Hey, you just got punched in the neck. That wasn't me, I was hacked. YOLO.” Lumbersexual : ((A Metro-sexual who has the need to hold on to some outdoor based rugged-ness, thus opting to keep a finely trimmed beard. )) Comment: What? I thought the metro-sexual thing was played out now. I've seen the full...

Random Things New Coke and Old Cosby: Two losing products  ______________________________________________________ ~Bill Cosby: I hate the fact there is more and more evidence out there that he has raped many women out there. As a black kid growing up in the suburbs, I looked up to Cosby and his sitcom from the 80s. It showed that a black family didn't have to be from the hood or talk in slang terms. It was a show about educated black people and that meant a lot to me. Now, we're finding out that he's a terrible person, allegedly. I've agreed with him politically in the past about his stance on the black community, but now I have to distance myself from him. He's an asshole. Heck, I share a birthday with this guy. Stop going on tour and go hide away from a while, dude .    ~ AC/DC drummer: I was listening to AC/DC on Howard Stern and Stern mentioned that their drummer was caught up in a murder scandal thingy. Phil Rudd supposedly hired...

That Star Trek V Press Conference Yes, that was awkward wasn't it? The people over at R Cringe are talking about the fact that Shatner might have truly forgotten his co-star's name, but I think he did it on purpose. However, I don't know the names of most of my co-workers, but I do know the ones I've worked with for a long time. I think this was during the height of Shatner's ego. Keep in mind that this was around the time when he belittled a 15 year old Wil Wheaton. And, sent Wheaton crying off the STV set defeated. Shatner is known for really belittling his co-stars. Walter Koenig is pissed. I love that he doesn't miss a beat reminding Shatner his name. - James Doohan : I think James simmered down with his hatred of Shatner at this point in his life. - George Takei : I know things have gotten very bad between these two lately. I heard Takei thought about sitting this movie out. However, he got a call from Shatner tryi...

This is probably the best ad ever I'd almost want to be a member of their banking company. Heck they have a sense of humor. Since when has banking and humor mixed. Also, note the permanent smile on the woman “actor” typing and the fact the screen doesn't change. From what I can tell , the company seems real.

Chief Police office does speaks the truth I am sure I would disagree with most of his stances, but I completely agree with him on this issue. At work, I told a left-leaning person my view on the problems in the black community and I pretty stated what this guy said in this video without watching the video. There is WAY too much violence in black communities and it is mostly directed at other black people. You're not going to find another group that hates itself so much like some of the areas I've scene. We come together for police related shooting and call out racism, which is good. However, where are the black leaders denouncing the crime on black on black crime? Where are they when discussing the large amount of guns on the streets? Where are they in the discussions about the large amounts of fatherless children? This pisses me off so much. End of line...

Cinemorgue Wiki: A very dark wiki Everyone dies...more than once.  There are wikis for everything out there from pornstars to GTA games and I read a lot of them. I stumbled across this one looking up some actors on Too Many Cooks and this site came up. The catch for this site is listing actors' character deaths from various media outlets. I think it is a very neat site, because I can't always keep track of every character that dies. In Lost, pretty much everyone is listed . Michelle Rodriguez dies a lot in her career . At this point, she should really know how to do a death scene. She is the female Sean Bean. She dies at least three-four times in the Resident Evil movies. Remember, she dies at one point and comes back as a zombie and dies again. Then, there is that sequel . She kind of dies in Fast and Furious franchise and then gets retconned into living. Then there is that great Lost Death. Do I even have to mention Sean Bean ? And, I did...

The Mormon Jesus Song...word This song actually works. I was watching a couple of atheists deconstruct the that strange anti-Mormon video , and I remember that someone remixed the it into a song. I had forget how much space and galaxy stuff is in the actual faith...kind of reminds me of another space-based religion.   BTW, these are all fixed gear bikes.  Usually, hipsters ride around on these things.  I usually see Mormons ride on mountain bikes like myself.  Some hipsters will use road bikes, but never mountain bikes.  And, you don't usually see Mormons use road bikes.  

Farts: Now I know and knowing is all the battle Actually, I don't like the smell of my own farts. As I've written before, I think my farts smell worst now than they did 20 years ago. Plus, they're longer and more powerful in sound. Everything else seems to get weaker on our bodies, but the farts keep getting stronger. BTW, I love how old people will cut a fart and not give a total shit (literally?) about it. I was behind an old man in a Kroger store and he just kept ripping farts as he walked down the aisle. It was as if the farts were a propulsion system for him.     

I was really pissed off when I read the title to the website The Verge by Chris Plante and Arielle Duhaime-Ross. ((I don't care if you landed a spacecraft on a comet, your shirt is sexist and ostracizing)) I took some time to sleep on it and let it simmer down for me. The title of the post pissed me off so much, that I knew I wouldn't be writing a good piece discussing why this is a problem. First off, I am a huge sci-fi guy. I've watched so many hours of Star Trek/Alien/BSG/Star Wars stuff that it might be considered a sickness. Being a guy that used to be a C- student and have trouble with math, I look up to scientists and people in space exploration. They are doing something I'll never be able to do. They make the world a more interesting place with their knowledge. We as writers think things up, they think things up and build them. That's truly amazing. Despite all the horrible things going on this planet right now, the human race did som...

Glen A Larson RIP From The Hollywood Reporter , ((Glen A. Larson, the wildly successful television writer-producer whose enviable track record includes Quincy M.E., Magnum, P.I., Battlestar Galactica, Knight Rider and The Fall Guy, has died. He was 77. )) I was in shock when this came up in the Google News section.  It is kind of strange that Too Many Cooks parodies the era that Larson was a powerhouse TV producer. Larson probably shaped my TV habits for years.  I would watch his sci-fi based shows on reruns on Saturdays.  It feels strange to know all my TV icon writers/producers/creators/actors are dying off.  His stuff wasn’t always great, but it was fun to watch when I was a little kid.  (Knight Rider and BSG)  He seemed to have the idea of having really cool cars and machines around a good-looking lead male actor.  And, then top it off with a kick ass theme song.   I still love his shows today and ...

The Lego Movie Holy cow, this is a pretty entertaining movie with a good message. I totally overlooked this little gem of a movie when it came out, because I wasn't interested in the Lego franchise (movies or video games). However, this movie works on a kid and adult level. It was a lot of fun, and that should be the focal point of these type of movies. Emmet Brickowski is the hero of the movie AKA the chosen one. I mean he is literally the chosen one. He's just a mundane character that goes out of his way to fit in his world. However, no one really notices him. Emmet also has the ability to make foolish inventions that make no sense. We get to see him go on his adventure with the female ninja Wyldstyle. Like the Roger Rabbit and the Toy Story franchises, the movie presents a world where other licensed characters show up in cameo appearances. One huge cameo had me really smiling especially with its relationship with Batman. I don't want to give it away,...

Jonathan Koppenhaver, you're even worst than before. When I read the headline to this link, anger arouse inside me. Allegedly, Daily Mail reported that War Machine started to smirk. I guess his hearing is going on right now. Christy Mack took the witness stand and WM started to laugh at her testimony . From inquisitr.com, (( KLAS-TV   reports that Jonathan Koppenhaver (also known as War Machine) started laughing shortly after the prosecutor asked Christy Mack, “Was there sexual violence?” and she responded with a “yes.” )) Regardless of the time line, we know that you did in fact beat the living crap out of her. Not some threats on twitter or harassing e-mails, but you physically beat the living crap out of her. There is physical evidence. I think sometimes overlook the actual physical abusers. Yet, you sit there and laugh. You think this is a joke?  You laugh about beating someone you supposedly loved in their own home.  That's just evil.   I ha...

Space Harrier favorite themes I used to pay the hell out of this game on my Sega Master System. I always loved the tracks because they were a bit jazzy. I fondly remember the main track that played at different times during your run though the game. aahhh, get ready.

Shirt-Gate, shit-gate? Watch the other people stare at him with total confusion. That wasn't the question she asked you, man. Is that guy smiling right next to him? Are we now at the point when everything is offensive?   Oh, boy. Here we go again. It seems Dr. Matt Taylor from the Rosetta Project made more headlines than the damn project he was working on...with his choice of shirts. The shirt, which probably was a poor choice, had drawings of women in “sexy” gear and other outfits. Now, the tumblr world is flipping their shit. I'd have a problem with this outcry if MRAs got pissed if a women wore a shirt depicting men in bondage gear. Calm down, it is just a nerd picking the wrong shirt. Maybe, he should have picked out that annoying dragon shirt instead. Here's the best part. The person that asked him to wear the shirt was a woman. She designed and made the shirt for him for his birthday. If a nice lady made me a shirt...for fre...

NPC's ruin Assassin's Creed Scene I guess this is the price you pay for using in-game character models. Sometimes NPCs will wonder into a scene. I have to say the character models do look great and the voice acting is good, but I could not keep track of that since the NPC characters steal the show. Going through the reddit comments, I came across an even greaterglitch from GTA 5. Yep, the NPC cops actually start firing at the two characters during their scene! Man, I literally laughed out loud.

While I liked the Family Guy Simpsons crossover better, this is still a fun little episode. I only wished the stakes were a little higher and that episode was a hour long like the Family Guy crossover. However, it is good to see the Future cast again, despite it being very limiting. I also enjoy how Bender and Homer bond over the first half of the episode. The second half deals with the future. I think second half is the weaker portion of the script, but not by much. It is still fun. I just think the show should have been a hour long so we spent the first half hour with the major characters in the present and then the second in the future. Now, don't get me started if this episode is in continuity with either Futurama or The Simpsons. That would take up more time than I feel I need to write here. Overall, I loved the episode, despite the fact I felt it was a little rushed and short changed. This will probably be the last time we see the Futurama crew. Grade: B...

  Jii Lighter: What the F' did I just watch? Came across this strange ad on Reddit and I am still confused by it. Could you imagine Coke products being sold in such a manner? I'm in. From the video and Google, I get that the lighter is USB rechargeable and it comes in various “fun” colors. I understand things are a bit different there and you can show cigarettes in ads. Plus, I don't think they're vilified as much as they are here in North America.  Keep in mind I hate cigs.   -Mad Scientist invents Jii: I almost wanted him to say, “Gentlemen, I present to you Jii Lighter.” -So, it is safe for the environment. Thanks. -Jii is a bit horny: He has SEX with an older lighter. What in the hell?  I guess he's into the Cougars and MILFs.  More power to you, Jii-Jii.  -Jii-Jii's USB port is in his ass. Nice. I've never been excited about a lighter, but I'll give the company props for being excited for their USB ligh...