Wednesday, December 31, 2008

The Crank 2: High Voltage

Jason Statham: Driving cars really fast and beating people up: Those two things pretty much sum up his career. The Italian Job, Crank, Death Race. He’s like the Burt Reynolds of our time: Smokey and the Bandit, The Cannonball Run, Stroker Ace, except Statham is cooler.

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The Crank 2: High Voltage

Check out the trailer here.

I wasn’t exactly a huge fan of the first movie when it came out. And, my review states that. It was not my cup of tea. (Though, the scene in Chinatown with Amy Smart was a nice treat.)

Then something happened, I began to watch bits and pieces of the movie over time on HBO. I started to enjoy the movie a bit more. I wouldn’t say I love the movie, but I can see why people like the first film. There is a balls-out attitude about it I think people enjoy.

Well, an uncensored trailer for Crank 2 has come out and I’m really digging what I’ve seen so far.

At this point, they’re going for the whole graphic comic book/video game vibe completely.

The trailer has nudity and a lot of cussing. Some of the other things in the trailer I won't even mention here.

And, I believe there is a cameo from Jenna Haze. I guess she’s in the movie playing a hooker, imagine that. (I can’t find her role on her IMDB page.)

I am really starting to like these R-rated trailers.

Transformers PSAs?

Transformers PSA?

Do you remember those GI Joe PSAs from the 80s? Did you know the Transformers also had a few PSA (Public Service Announcements) too?

While both GI Joe and Transformers were both produced by the same studio, only GI Joe characters would say these silly PSAs at the end of the show. During the second season, someone decided to make some Transformers versions of the PSAs.

I personally don't think a big freaking robot can give you life advice. And, it would see the writers also agreed and these PSAs never aired on TV. Transformers seemed a little too sci-fi to have these corny PSAs, but it seemed to fit with the GI Joe episodes. Keep in mind, He-Man and She-Ra also had PSAs too.

Basically, the un-aired Transformers PSAs were re-makes of the GI Joe ones.

Below is the GI Joe Version

Well, they did the same one with the Autobot Powerglide. (With different animation)

Anyway, you can check out the rest here.

Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Black Dynamite

Black Dynamite: A very R-rated Red Ban trailer.

Think of this film as a Grindhouse type film, except it is a blaxploitation movie. I really enjoyed the Grindhouse movies, so I’m looking forward to the movie. And like Grindhouse, I think mostly film geeks will enjoy and get more out of the film. I’ll still probably see it on DVD.

Here’s a clean teaser trailer without the MF’ers and nudity.

The red-band trailer, in the link above, is not as funny as this one, but has more r-rated stuff. Plus, you get to see shots pornstars Charlotte Stokely and Charmane Star naked. However, if you already know their names, you’ve seen them do worst things than taking off their clothes.

Michael Jai White, the guy that was killed by the Joker in The Dark Knight and played Spawn, is Black Dynamite. He seems to be playing the role in a comedic tone. I think he fits the role perfectly.

Both Keenen Ivory Wayans (A Low Down Dirty Shame) and Samuel L. Jackson (Shaft remake) have tried to bring this brand of filmmaking back with little success. I enjoyed both of those films though. Keep in mind, Grindhouse also failed to make some coin too.

Btw, Any movie that has a guy knocking over an old woman can’t be that bad right?

Things that make you go Hmmm...

You know google amazes me sometimes.

Now, there was a murder in Louisville today…

You can read about it here.

What struck me was that I was curious where the murder happened. So, I did a google map search and I recognized the location. And I'm usually riding my bike through this area on Broadway. (No, I wasn't there when the crime happened, I was in the Highlands.)

In a morbid way, people can find out exactly where a crime has happen using google.

Note: check out the street view option on google and you can see a person in a wheelchair sitting at a traffic light! (Click on the forward view at the intersection and turn to your right to the person.)

You have to wonder if this person knows that he’ll forever be in archives of google maps. We can look up someone’s Myspace or Youtube account after a news story has broke and other things. (I’m sure Casey Anthony had a myspace at one point.)

Hell, I'm sure I'm in one of the google maps somewhere.

It’s a shame I have to make this observation with a murder news story.

That David Sides guy

While chatting it up with MC, we came across some interesting covers from different artists. One that I thought was outstanding was a guy named David Sides. This is an amazing composer and performer. He takes popular songs and changes them into piano songs.

Yet, he takes it a step further. Turns many of them into ballads, songs that weren’t intended to be ballads.

One of his best is his cover of The Lollipop Song

Yeah, he took an otherwise dirty and stupid song and turned it into a good song. (His Myspace and his YouTube Account is here.)

Here's his cover of Ice Box: The original song I believe uses a sample from Chrono Trigger.

His “Touch My Body” cover is also worth listening to.

His Timberlake cover of “What Goes Around” is pretty good.

This guy has skills, and I hope to see more from him.

It makes me wish I stayed with my Music career all those years ago.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Random Things

Random Things

~Superman at Earth's End: I have never heard of this comic book story. What was DC thinking? Since when did Superman turn into a flying Santa? Why are there two Hitler clones in this story? A mutated Batman? I can't believe someone green-lit this mess.

~Angry Video Game Nerd has found even more Bible videogames: I'm not sure why Moses is solving puzzles in a dungeon. I also had no idea Konami made a Noah's Ark game. In that game, Noah can morph into a fish...a fish.

~Do we need more crap-filled reality shows from MTV, you know the channel that used to play music videos? What happened to the music MTV? I want my old MTV back.

~Here's an interesting story about film critic Earl Dittman. I can't believe some of the movies he enjoys. He liked Boat Trip and The Core. Both movies were universally panned.

Not so Magical song

That Magical Negro song…People are not happy about this.

You can check out the song here

((Republicans who are vying to lead the national party offered a mix of reactions yesterday to the decision by one candidate for the job to mail out a music CD including the song "Barack the Magic Negro."))

Man, there are some people out there that are really pissed about President-elect’s Barack Obama’s win. I still can’t believe someone thought this song was suitable. This song is just embarrassing and it shows the true hatred some have about this guy.

A true sign of hatred is when someone takes an educated man and reduces him to a stereotype. Why are there so many people that can’t get over this?

The song isn’t even funny.

And, what’s with sampling Puff the Magic Dragon? Talk about out of touch. That song was before my time, believe. Then again, remixing a Britney Spears song won’t really work.

The man that sent out the CD is a douche, but look closer at the guy. Chip Saltsman is his name.

Look closer...

Doesn’t he look like Glenn Quagmire from Family Guy? I think we have a winner.

Friday, December 26, 2008

Disney dumps The Chronicles of Narnia series

We've been dropped?
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Disney dumps The Chronicles of Narnia series

I enjoyed the first film, actually I enjoyed the animals and the world more than the child actors, but I still haven’t got around to seeing the second movie. However, given how Disney treated the second film, it is no wonder they are dropping out of the third film.

From the link above,

((While declining to elaborate, Disney and Walden Media confirmed Tuesday that for budgetary and logistical reasons the Burbank-based studio is not exercising its option to co-produce and co-finance the next "Narnia" movie with Walden.))

Something tells me Disney started to get cold feet right around the opening of the second movie.

((It is rare for a studio to pull out of a planned trilogy in midstream, but the number-crunching showed a franchise on a downward trend. "Lion" roared to $292 million domestically and another $453 million internationally in 2005. This year, "Prince Caspian" grossed a healthy $141 million in North America and another $278 million internationally, but that was well off the "Lion" take.))

I think part of the problem was Disney releasing the film in May of this year, when it should have been released in November 2008.

Anyway, something tells me some studio will probably pick up the movie and release it.

The Spirit: Some guy really likes the movie...

Could there be some shady things going on in the Lionsgate and their marketing of ‘The Spirit’? The good folks over at Slash Film discovered a certain review quote for one of the Spirit TV spots.

Someone at Lionsgate made one critic into critics. This critic calls The Spirit “One of the best movies of the year”. That’s not something you throw around unless you’re looking for a movie quote to be played on an ad.

Even the most positive reviews of The Spirit aren’t that positive. I just find it strange a big budget studio (is Lionsgate really that big?) has to dig up a glowing review like this and make it seem like a lot of critics are digging the movie.

What would be worst is if a marketing firm started quoting me from one of my reviews. I’m just a stupid blogger.

You can click on the link above and do a search into the guy that was behind the review.

Side note: The movie is hovering around 14% on rotten tomatoes. For comparison, Meet Dave has a 19% and The Spirit is tied with The Love Guru.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (review)

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor

Not as bad as I thought it would end up, but it is certainly not even close in quality to the first two films. The shine from the Mummy series is gone, but there are some fun moments here and there to keep you from getting bored with the film.

After conquering China, Emperor Han (Jet Li) searches for magic to make him even more powerful. Instead of assisting him in his thirst for power, Zi Yuan (Michelle Yoeh) double crosses him and curses Han and his army. Flash-forward to 1946, and the Mummy-fighting gang must stop Han from taking over the world.

Yep, that’s pretty much the plot in a nutshell. It’s actually a little more complex than many action films of today, but because Rob Cohen is directing, the storyline isn’t handled that well. Cohen doesn’t seem too concerned with connecting the scenes and locations in a natural manner, so the film feels even more disjointed compared to the Stephen Sommers films.

And, that’s the problem, there is a good adventure movie wrapped up in this mess of a story. And, Cohen is the reason behind the disarray. Cohen doesn’t have the creative skills to make a fun adventure, and that’s a real shame because this movie deserves better. Cohen, like Brett Ratner, is a by the numbers kind of guy that won’t cause any trouble for the studio. So, that means we won’t see much style or character development either.

But, even from a pure Popcorn Flick standpoint, The Mummy III is lacking.

However, not everything about the movie is bad…

Things I liked

-Moving the series from the Middle East to the East (China) gives the movie a fresh start.

-The dead armies and their special effects are impressive.

-The opening was also enjoyable.

-Michelle Yeoh was good in her limited role.

Things that I disliked

-The Acting is bad: Brendan Fraser seems bored and he’s worst here than in many of his earlier roles. Luke Ford is the lead man, and he’s horrible. Why is there not much of an age difference between Ford and Fraser? They’re supposed to be father and son. They couldn’t cast a younger actor? How about one that wasn’t as bland as Ford either?

-Jet Li is completely wasted. He just turns into really bad CGI monsters throughout the movie and frowns. Why cast him if you’re not going to use him?

-While the battle between the two undead armies was impressive, the final third act was a huge letdown. The movie simply gives up on a big ending and grinds to a halt. The ending needed another rewrite.

-The last few moments were some of the worst moments I’ve seen ever this year. There’s a stupid text mentioning that mummies were discovered in Peru. I’m not making that up, they didn’t even bother to film a teaser for the next film. They just slapped a text on the screen and cut to credits.

-Maria Bello is no Rachel Weisz.

Overall, this latest Mummy movie isn’t the train wreck that The Spirit will probably be, but it is lacking the fun and adventure that the last two films had going for them. Cohen is to blame for the total mess the last act is.

In the end, it doesn’t matter what anyone says, they’re making a fourth one.

Grade: C-

Side note: It would appear both Indiana Jones and O'Connell family worked with Allies during World War II. Both movies mention they’re help during the war offhandedly too.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Extended John Lee Hooker 'Boom Boom' from the movie Blues Brothers

Extended John Lee Hooker 'Boom Boom' from the movie Blues Brothers

In the theatrical version, John Lee Hooker's scene is nothing more than an cameo. When the extended cut of the Blues Brothers came out, this scene ends up being much longer.

In this version, there are more reaction shots from the crowd and the Blues Brothers stay and listen to most of the song here.

At the end of the song, Hooker gets into an argument with a person in the crowd. After the Aretha Franklin 'Think' number, you can still hear them arguing in the background! (It won't make sense in the Theatrical version.)

You can clearly tell these guys are really playing this song on the set.

Even more fun with terms…

Even more fun with terms…

Thanks to the Urban Dictionary I can learn new terms

booty grazing: Guys send generic, flirty texts to a bunch of potential hookups at one, to see who's up for a session, and pick from the girls who respond, all of whom believe they are the only one being texted.

Comment: I guess this is the version of carpet-bombing for a booty call right? If you throw a rock into a crowd, you’re bound to hit someone. So, I guess your chances of getting a Holla-back girl are high. What happens when you snag a dude in the process? Remember, you’re casting a huge net.

Economic Vegetarian: Only eating Vegatables because you can't afford to buy meat.

Comment: I can see this happening. Veggies are cheap.

bumper sticker activism: To tell the world what they should be doing and what you think by plastering your car with bumper stickers to that effect.

Comment: I hate these MF’ers. If I wanted to read about your stupid political views, I read your hippie or conservative blogs. Why force me to think about complex shit while I’m waiting at the light? And, what’s the deal with the Hipster call with rear end covered in bumper stickers?

I really hate the pro-life and pro-choice bumper stickers. While we’re at it, it is time to take down those McCain/Palin stickers.

Shoplift the Pooty: When a man sleeps with a single mother with a small child. Also, when a man expresses false adornment for a women's child in order to sleep with her.

Comment: You try to get in good with the child so you can have a stab (poor choice of words) at the MiLF. They don’t care about the child and simply want chick. I’ve seen a few guys do this move. Nope, I’ve never tried this move…yet.

putting lipstick on a pig: A term used by many, generally in reference to someone who may be trying to make something or someone look appealing or attractive when it quite clearly will not work, or will only deceive the dumbest of people.

Comment: Have you ever tried to put lipstick on a pig? I can imagine it being pretty hard to accomplish. Then after you’re done putting lipstick on a pig, what’s next?

Hell, we’re still trying to make pigs fly and we haven’t accomplished that either. Let’s get the lipstick on first and then make them fly.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Crying Sorority Girl, she just wanted to make it snow.

Crying Sorority Girl

Man, this is priceless. When this was released, I knew nothing about it. It became the new viral video.

So, what’s the history behind this crying sorority girl?

Elyse Downs wanted to make the sorority house hallway look like it snowed. So, she sprayed the hallway with a damn Fire Extinguisher. I guess vapor from the extinguisher caused the fire alarm to go off, thus waking up everyone in the building.

The video above is the aftermath. This is something out of a college movie from the 80s.

What pisses me off she's getting the same degree as me. She's a Communications Major.

Now, you might be asking yourself who is the woman behind the camera? Brianna is her name and she’s cute. She looks like the sister of the girl in the video. How did this video get released?

I really like this Brianna chick because she laughs in her friend’s face. That’s takes balls my friend and Brianna, you’ve got them. (Hold on, wait…)

I personally don’t understand the whole frat/sorority thing. What happened to simply getting good grades and getting a good job?

They're both in this sorority and it looks like all the members are cute. You can find them both there, but something tells me you'll see them removed from the page.

Sorry, Delgo

Update on Delgo

Delgo disappears from the theaters.

Poor, Delgo.

I feel a little bad about picking on this little movie. Knowing that an independent (Marc F. Adler) writer/director put this film together, which took nearly eight years to get made, it makes me feel sort of bad for the major flop-age.

What I don’t like is that Freestyle Releasing, the distribution company, has done with the film. It looks like Freestyle is attempting to rewrite history by removing all mentions of Delgo from their site. They don’t even have the movie listed in their releases! Yet, here they are listed in IMDB.

Listen, I know they don’t want to be associated with this kind of record-breaking historic moment for the least-attended film ever on 2k screens. But, if you agree to distribute the film, you can’t run away after the crap hits the fan.

Mac Vs. PC Transformers

Mac Vs. PC Transformers

Wow, I’m impressed. The CGI was done in the style of Transformers the movie and it works well. I wished my PC would transform into a freaking robot. It would probably lock up due to spyware though.

Yeah, the acting by the folks in the beginning isn’t that great, but the computer animation is superb. I’ll have to find out more about this video.

Why can’t the advertising folks do something like this?

Monday, December 22, 2008

Remakes in Sci-fi

Even the poster is lame.
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Io9 has a list of the 10 worst sci-fi remakes

Some of these I've seen and some I just down right refuse to watch.

Here are a few comments on a few of them

The Island Of Doctor Moreau: I’ve never seen this one and I probably will never see it. The behind the scene horror stories tell me that the movie was doomed from the story. Like the writer states, you have to keep Brando (had) in check. Val Kilmer has gone from this to making really bad albums, because he thinks he can sing.

Planet Of The Apes: I’ve already said a lot about this one. What's up with the ending again?

Invasion: This one is a complete mess. They brought in the Wachowski Brothers to do rewrites for re-shoots after the movie was completed. You can tell when the original director left off and the Wachowski stuff was thrown in. Plus, the movie is just plain boring.

Stepford Wives: Again, this movie is a total mess. I mean you can tell they were re-shooting scenes and were in trouble, because the tone of the film kept changing. The funny part is the trailers are full of the deleted and old scenes from the first cut.

Rollerball: This has to be in the top ten worst movies of all times. I had to force myself to sit through this mess. John McTiernan should have known better. Even LL Cool J bashed the film after its release.

Random Thoughts

Random Thoughts

~Where do the samples from Hip-Hop come from? Check out this guy's video and he plays the origins of the popular songs we've all heard. Part 1 part 2 part 3 part4. This guys is really entertaining.

~I went over to a friend’s house and played World of Warcraft. He played on computer and I played on another one in his home. We used headsets and played with a few quests and gain some levels. I loved playing the game, but I simply can’t get caught up in playing another online RPG. I really like WoW, but I can see myself getting addicted. I've had that happen before.

~The Mouth of Sauron has his own myspace page. Even the voice of pure evil has his own page.

~You have to wonder if anyone even remotely cares what Axl Rose has to say anymore. I still don't get why it took him nearly ten years to get the album together (or longer). And I haven't forgot about that racist song he sang back in the day either. How can you call the group Guns and Roses when he's the only founding member left in the group?

~I've watched all of Prison Break this season and I've really enjoyed the way they've handled the show. I still love the show, but I hope they end it this season. There's not much more they can do with the story. The recent episode was a little too Sopranos in the dream department for me though.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Paula Abdul's Straight Up

Had much surgery there Paula?

Paula Abdul's Straight Up

Check the music video here.

Looking back at the Paula Abdul of old, you can see a woman with ambition and who was into her work. Yet, when you look at her today, she's on a popular show, if annoying, and she looks out of it. She brings nothing to the show or to her singing career. I think sometimes people reach a certain point in their lives and they forget where they came from. You know the hard work that got them there. People forget she was a Laker Girl before becoming a choreographer.

Anyway, this song is simple. Keep in mind that this song was written in the late 80s and it a product of 80’s pop music. If you listen carefully, you hear the computer enhancement on her voice in this song.

The lyrics are simple and you can’t go wrong with

Straight up now tell me
Do you really want to love me forever oh oh oh
Or am I caught in a hit and run
Straight up now tell me
Is it gonna be you and me together oh oh oh
Are you just having fun

The synthetic instrumentation is a bit annoying, but this was still technically the 80s.

The Video

Movie director David Fincher (Zodiac, Fight Club, and Seven) directed the video. Yes, that Fincher.

The video is in black and black and it fits in nicely with song. Since Arsenio Hall was banging Paula at the time, she had him in the music video. He mostly grins and laughs while everyone around him dances. You would too if your were dating a young Paula post-Lakers Girl.

The video is far better than what the song deserves. And, I can’t see anything from the directing that tells me that this was the same director from Fight Club.

The video also gets points for not having a damn cartoon cat dancing with her.

Music grade: C

Music Video grade: C+

Here's a guy doing a cover of the song and it actually sounds better than the real song.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Lil Jon and Lazy Town Mash Up

Snap your fingers, do the step, you can do it all by yourself.

Lil Jon and Lazy Town Mash Up

As I was checking through The Samurai frog blog and came across this little mash-up. I just love how wrong and strange mash up. The reaction from the characters to the mash up is funny too.

Lazy Town is a children's program that promotes dancing and working out. Hey, with all the kids playing Xbox 360, they need to get out more. The show is filmed in Iceland with an America lead actress. No, I didn't watch this show, I had to Wiki it up.

Here's how the song was originally conceived, before Lil Jon hyped it up.

I think Lil John hypes up any song if you mashed up him with it.

“Yeah”

No Diggity

No Diggity

Probably one of my favorite hip-hop tracks is Blackstreet’s song ‘No Diggity’.

No Diggity (1996)

The song had a cameo from Dr. Dre. Musically, It was also a contrast from New Jack Swing music from earlier in the decade. The beat also mixes samples from Bill Withers' Grandma's Hands. (better version of Grandma's Hands)

Check out the Penny Hardaway-like dolls used in this video, which shows the video’s age. There’s not much to the video except women dancing in a wet parking lot at night.

Remixes

The original song is still best, but there are two more remixes from Blackstreet. Both of remixes diverge from the original song.

Here's the first remix

The second uses a Michael Jackson track.

(I believe Chris Rock did the voice for the Lil Penny doll)

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Majel Barrett-Roddenberry

Majel Barrett-Roddenberry, who was the long time wife of Gene Roddenberry, has passed away.

She was 76.

This comes as a complete shock to me.

From MSN,

((The actress died of leukemia at 12:27 AM on Thursday with her son, Rod, by her side. She was diagnosed with the disease six months ago.))

I didn’t know she was sick. She’s pretty much been in every Star Trek spin-off in some form.

((And Majel also voiced the computer of the various starships used throughout all of the TV shows and movies from the sci-fi franchise — she just completed her voiceover work as the voice of the Enterprise in director J.J. Abrams’ reboot of “Star Trek,” due in theaters on May 8, 2009.))

She was with the name Majel Leigh Hudec, but changed it when she became an actress.

She was a class act, because she would never say anything bad about Gene when all the dirt about him started to surface. Especially, when the stories of his cheating came out from various actresses and women he worked with. He had a long time affair with Susan Sackett, who was his personal assistant.

In many ways, she was the mother of Star Trek.

She had a guest-star role on B5 too.

Random Pics

Yes, Louisville has a Zombie problem like the rest of the world. Sometimes they just come right into the clubs and feed on some random person at the club like this girl. I can’t tell how much a Zombie murder kills your buzz.
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Johnny: “Okay, which one do I smoke and which one do I drink. I’m so confused.”
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The woman in the middle is showing a whale-tail. I’m not making this up. Exposing your underwear seems to attract the boys from the yard, but does it work the other way around. If a dude revealed his boxers, do that work for the ladies?

Then there’s the tramp stamp. So, with a two-combo of a Whale Tail and a tramp stamp what does that make her?

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Raising the roof, why do we raise our hands when dancing? I never understand that.

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Getting it on the dance floor…someone has to clean the floors after this. I’d hate to be the janitor in this club.
BTW, she's asleep.
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Talk about an upgrade in Santa’s helpers. Is Santa’s divorce final yet?

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I get that Stalker/Crazy vibe for the lady on the left. Could this be my future stalker. I've always wanted my own personal stalker.
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Quickly, more beer. It's bound to get better...

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

SWV: Right Here (Human Nature remix)

SWV: Right Here (Human Nature remix)

Remember SWV?

SWV came onto the scene with this very smooth R&B jam using Michael Jackson’s Human Nature song. This song uses chords from Michael Jackson’s song throughout the track. This was beginning of SWV (Sisters With Voices).

Yeah, that’s Pharrell Williams saying S-W-V.

I’ve forgotten how pretty these ladies were.

This version received more play on radio than the original version and most people don’t know that this version isn’t the first version. The MJ Human Nature version receives more praise than the original as well.

Below is the first version without the MJ remix and it isn’t as good either.

And, this version is faster and has a New Jack Swing feel to it.

Here’s a sweet remix/Mashup with MJ singing with SWV

There’s something reassuring about a lady promising that her love will be right here.

Btw, SWV has reunited and is touring again.