Crayola Has nothing on me!

Reason 247 that I am not a fan of kids

I generally hate children, not all children, but quite a few of them. Given this fact, I went out with a few of my friends to Famous Dave’s, a pretty good rib restaurant, and it was freaking crowded. The place was busting with people. It was around 9-10 pm, and there were a lot of families in the place.

I sat across from my friends, and I was joking around; when I felt something hit my leg, something very small. As I looked down, on the floor, there was a crayon. I saw a blue crayon, resting near my shoe. I looked around to see who would have caused such a terrorist attack against me. Suddenly, I saw him, a young little toddler staring at me, pointing to his grounded crayon. His brown face and brown eyes looked over at me with such innocence that I almost felt bad for the little turd.

This fool going to throw a damn crayon at me!

“I think he wants his crayon back,” one friend said, laughing.

“Well, he shouldn’t have thrown it at me,” I said. And, there are a hundred motherf’ers in this place and I’m the one that he decided to assault with his color blue. I thought about smashing his crayon with my shoe, but then I saw his very single mom, and she was a total MILF. I quickly picked up the crayon and handed back to the little brat. His mother laughed and smiled. You see I’m a nice guy…