Semaj's Blog your Blog

Okay, finally something entertaining from Dragon Age: The Veilguard.  Man, this is funny.  So, the game refuses to let you give your female character a great ass.  So, a woke game doesn’t let you have all body types.   Seeing the crew of the Mass Effect series make fun of modern games.  Man, I miss these characters.  Finally, Jacob is cool.  This is so freaking funny.  I hope the same team doesn’t make ME4 or 5.  

At first, I didn’t get it.  I am not up on all the cool new memes and shit.  Well, I was browsing the KF on my man Chibi, I prefer you to be quiet guy, and they archive this post on a picture .   I am old and I didn’t understand the meme.  I was just focused on the woman’s shapely bum.  Why was the lamp on her and the “I” on him?  I googled the image and “ did some research ”.   In most Pixar logos, the lamp smashes the “I” in Pixar . So, someone decided to connect this to smashing stuff. For the dirtier-minded folks, it means knocking boots, which means sex. Only in your dreams, Chibi. Maybe you need to stop sending unwanted nudes to females, Chibi.

This Doolittle fellow popped and plopped into my feed.  He looks to be one of these whiney millennials who demand things out of people when they have no right to.  From what I can gather, Jake Doolittle was a hanger-on of famous Internet personalities.   Side note: His channel is a bit too soy-based for me, but he was doing pretty good numbers for his size. However, I am not sure how well his channel will do now after the rant. Given a lot of these high-profile YouTubers are shitheads, why would you want to have these Tubers join your charity?  No one is required to donate to your charity, dude, dude-little.  I am getting a disconnected vibe from him and the real world. Charities don't threaten people into giving money, unless you're Scientology. (I kid, I kid. Hail Xenu!) Here is the thing, never let YT be your only way to make money.  One, you have to build your resume with real work.  Two, the YT money won’t always be there. ...

Like most of the time, I was having a bad day, but this video made me laugh.  I like mean humor, and I like some trolling here and there.  I love that this guy is walking around causing random havoc for no other reason but for his own pleasure.  The best part is that the kid is rolling around like a drunk dog and squealing like a pig.   Brilliant I say.  

The Naked Gun series is one of my favorite comedy series out there.  I hate the stuffy shit like all those boring Woody Allen movies.  I’ll take a Leslie Nielsen movie over that shit. And, F' Woody Allen for good measure. Anyway, one of the staples of the series is the crazy opening credit  In the first one, you can see the shadow of the camera rig as it enters the house.  The locker room and the donuts shop are funny bits.  You can even hear the bell on the tire wire when it enters the scene.   The second one has a different version of the theme song, which is in a lower key than the first.  I love the bumper car bit. The extras are having a lot of fun with it.  This compilation cuts out the funniest bit from the second movie.  It is the Zsa Zsa Gabor cameo.  She gets pulled over by the Naked Gun credits.  I’ve never seen the actual opening credits pull someone over before.  Zsa Zsa got pulled over by some cops, and she...

I saw this story on Reddit .  I have no idea who this Little Xan is.  I tried to listen to this mumbling meth-head wannabe “rapper”.  I can't get through a single song.  If this is what modern rap sounds like, count me out.  I hate how the rap and hip hop stars fought so hard to be seen as legit musicians and these young mumble/marble-mouth rappers just go on stage and shit this stuff off.  What happened to music?  What happened to this new music genre?   What is up with the skinny jeans, the bad face tattoos, and the sleepy expression?  Why is this the uniform for all these mumble rappers?   Anyway, being the piece of shit skinny white trash that he is, Xan kicked and attacked a fan at some stupid concert.  However, the security guard did slam the skinny little prick.  The police are looking for this goblin and he’s gone into hiding.  I hope I don’t have to write about this guy again.  F’ him and his styl...

I have no idea if this was a legit proposal for a Nike commercial, but I have to say it is pretty ballsy to make it.  The sound and visuals make you think of something darker.  However, it turns out it is just someone trying harder to lose weight. 

Remember that scene where Charley Bowdre stayed with that hooker?  There was an extra scene where we would have discovered that the prostitute was Charley’s mother.  He knew she was his mother and just wanted her to hold him, given that he had never seen her.  He believes he is going to die and wants to maintain his long-lost mother one first and final time.  I think they should have kept this scene in and would have added a darker element to the movie.   From TV Tropes, (( Deleted Scene : In the DVD Commentary Casey Siemaszko reveals the prostitute Charlie goes to see was actually a longer scene, and the end of the scene he tells the guys the woman was his mother. )) It is a real shame they never bothered adding this scene because it shows the growth.   

Given this skit happened in 1990, I believe I was in middle school.   I love how memories work, pun intended.  Certain pop culture moments are connected to your past. I was a super geek, guaranteed that girls would never talk to me.  I hated attending school because I didn't fit in with the “cool kids”. At one point in my life, I decided to go my path.  I dressed and acted the way I wanted to.  I collected a few nerdy outsider friends as well.  We’d talk about VGs and Star Trek.  One of the nerdier things we’d discuss was the episodes of SNL.  From 10 to 21, SNL was in my life.   Anyway, there was a rather butch girl named Betty.  She was tall, chunky, and unattractive.  She and I had a few clashes because she was a low-effort bully.  Because her life wasn't great, she found pleasure in being an asshole to everyone that didn’t fit the norm.  I think she hated me the most because I refused to change.  She nev...