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I’m such a Geek, again. This week I rented Spiderman 2 and Happy Gilmore. What a strange combo. Just like X2, I really enjoyed Spiderman 2. Despite the poor dialogue, the movie is so much better than the first film. I’ll try to review this movie tomorrow.

I was hanging out in the theater lobby with friends when Brian’s girlfriend pointed out a guy wearing pink shorts. Pink shorts? How can some dude sport pink shorts and be hard? Pink is not a Hardcore color. You will never see a gang use pink as their color. Sorry guys, you can’t make pink hard. It’s not going to happen. On a side note, what was he thinking?

I looked up my name on http://www.urbandictionary.com. I have the worst term EVER! I wont even put it on here, but you'll laugh at it trust me.

Timeline What a horrible movie! It is a true turd. This Paul Walker crapfest was only in the theaters for a few weeks. Time travel at its worst. The plot is so dumb, I wont even recap. During the troubled posts-production of the film, the legend Jerry Goldsmith scored the music in the film originally. Believing the score was finished, Goldsmith moved on to work on other things. Richard Donner saw the cut of his film and decided to pump up the film with more action. He recalled Jerry Goldsmith to replace his romantic score with a more action score. Goldsmith did. After really bad test screenings, it was decided they needed more reshoots and more editing. Well, after they edited the movie, Goldsmith's score did not fit, and Goldsmith refused to rewrite his music again. I don’t blame him. They replaced him with another composer, but you can buy Goldsmith’s very good score even though it’s been rejected. I can’t believe one of my favorites directors Ri...

~ We need to bring back the catch phrase, “Surf’s up, dude!” ~ I guess that Beans, Beans song is correct. It is musical fruit. The more you eat the more you toot. The more you toot the better you feel. Let’s have beans for every meal. ~ I am sick of “Your momma jokes”. We need to start using “Your daddy joke”. ~ Again, these birds keep pooping onto my car. What is a brother to do? ~ I rented the Incredibles and Batman the animated series DVDs this week. I’m such a geek! It’s okay when you’re blond, I guess. I was at a gas station, and there was a goofy blond teenager there roaming the inside store. I was standing in lane, and she walked up asking about playing cards, behind me. The next thing I know, I hear a thunderous crash, and I look back. She knocked over an entire display of angel figurines! Embarrassed, she starts trying to pick up the shattered pieces with her hands. I, being an asshole, couldn’t help but laugh. The clerks at th...

What is with people? I was heading toward the library when I stepped through the first set of doors inside the little room. I heard a voice say to someone on a pay phone, “Dude, what up? Guess what? I passed the Piss test, dude!” Now I’m thinking, is this something you want to share with everyone in the library? And, considering the automatic door was open, and everyone in earshot heard him. Moreover, why would you call another dude about a piss test? Also, he seemed surprised he actually passed. Hmm…

Here is the older meaning of boner from urbandictionary.com 3. boner failing an attempt at accomplishing something through clumsiness and stupidity "Jimmy pulled a real Boner move during the football game"

Here it is superdickery.com I came across this site on a message board. This site started out showing the how much of a Jerk Superman really was. It pretty much bashes old DC comics as well. It is truly funny site on the bad comics from the early years. Please check it out BTW, this Batman “boner” thing had me rolling. I loved the fact they kept using it. I believe “boner” meant stupid before the “other” meaning. But, I’m not sure how that meaning fits into the context on this Batman comic.

If you want to know where those Batman pics came from, come back here later today to find out the story behind these REAL pics, and the funny site of week behind them.

Wonderful 

Strange 

What is wrong with the Joker? 

funny 

Funny 

~ Thank goodness Deadwood and The Shield are back on the air. Besides, Enterprise , I pretty much stopped watching TV. BTW, the wonderful Cop show The Wire has been renewed for another season on HBO. This is great! ~ I read the book Star Trek TNG Q Squared by Peter David within three days. This guy is a great writer; please try to read some of his work. He is also known for revamping old comic book heroes, such as Hulk, and Supergirl. ~ Things couldn’t be more busy for me than what I’m doing this week. ~ It was pointed out to me, that I’m so withdrawn from work, that I don’t even know when people have been fired from the work area. Perhaps, I hate my job so much that I pretty much block out everything that goes on around me. ~ Strangely enough, I was driving down the highway alone at 5am, when a truck came racing up to my rear bumper. I thought perhaps he would go around me by using the fast line, but no, he stayed on my tail for miles. Then, he de...

Please read the 1st forget post to understand this one. Thank you, to Brian and his girlfriend for inviting to the movies Saturday night. It was a shock that they called right after I posted on my Blog about spending the Saturday night alone. We watched Constantine. I'll have more on this movie later. Anyway, thank you guys for letting me be the 5th wheel

Now that Robert Blake is free here are seven things he can do with his life. Hang out with OJ on the golf course. Buy some stock in Enron. Marry Martha Stewart. Wait for Money Train 2 to start filming. “You’d make a great killer.” Search for the “real killers”. Run for Governor! Start you own reality show where you kill people and see if you can get away with it.

I dont want to go out to the movies tonight. There's nothing to watch, plus I hate crowds. I'll just stay in on another Sat night...

"There he is!" "Yo, how you doing" "let's poop on his car!" "better yet, poop on his head" 

What is up with these birds? You don’t see me pooping on their cars. Anyone else remember the Good Feathers? They must be like the Good Feathers. The Goodfeathers were a parody of the Goodfellas, except it was birds.

Random thoughts ~ Every time I go to my car, I get more bird poop on it. These evil birds cover my car with it as if they have a major beef with me. Are the birds using laser guidance systems? ~ I was driving down the street and noticed those people who wear those goofy outfits and signs at intersections. There were two guys dressed like the Statue of Liberty, waving foolishly at random cars as they passed. I thought, these guys must feel like total fools standing out there . Maybe they don’t. ~ Thank God those girl scouts wont be spamming every shopping center doorway in the USA for a while. I don’t mind girl scout cookies and such, but I hate being bugged about it. ~ Speaking of Spam, don’t you just hate when you get an email from one of them that tricks into thinking it’s a long lost friend. Titles like, hey there! Following up on our last communication, check this out! Good to see you again! Damn these guys. ~ I really need to stop sleeping so m...

Well, I’m going to the movies tonight. I know I’m going to regret being around those damn teenagers. The fools come out on Saturday nights. I am going to use my movie “rain check.”

WAVERLY HILLS SANATORIUM A week ago, someone from CA asked me if I knew anything about the Waverly Hospital. At first, I said no. Then I realized I had been to the place. We just call it the TB Hospital. This person said it was one of the most haunted places in the US. Though the I didn’t hear any whispers from the hundreds of dead, it was really spooky. I’ve snuck into this place a few times with my good friends. This place is creepy and some believe it’s haunted. First, you walk along a railroad track to get to the place. After a few miles, you veer off into some dark thick woods. Inside, the building is truly creepy. This place really looks like a real life silent hill game. I’ve posted some pics of the real place and some of the videogame Silent hill, they look alike Please read this link for more info… http://www.waverlyhillstbsanatorium.com/

okay... 

another real photo 

Looks just like the game... 

Creepy 

here's a good one to compare to the real photos. 

This bunny is creepy 

Two screwed up pop stars standing together. I've noticed that she is much darker than MJ. Does this seem right? No matter how much you try, MJ you cant run away from who you are.

What have you done to yourself, MJ? It needs to stop, you were great once.

What does Jay Leno have to do with the Michael Jackson trial? Did he give the children Doritos? Did his CHIN answer any questions? Who are they going to call next OJ? Maybe, I’m out of the loop. I need to really keep up with the case.

"After I leave the talk show, I'm going back to being known as (That Doritos Guy)" 

I read and post in other blogs. here are some I check out. give them a try Jeff http://tjoeblog.blogspot.com/ http://viva-voce.blogspot.com/

I'm feeling like **** today.

Here's site 2 its not interesting but I'll put it up anyway! http://www.chemistrycoach.com/lewisflow.htm the fact that I understand some of this mess is amazing...

Someone at Streamingsoundtracks.com (a cool cat named Aces) brought up the fact that Michael Jackson’s lawyer looks like the dude from the Quaker Oaks boxes. Here’s the pictures, enjoy.

"Not only am I a lawyer for washed up pop icons, but I make a pretty good oatmeal too.” 

He's just missing the hat. No wonder MJ picked him. (Note: Look at the girl to his left with the sign, what a strange expression she has.) 

~ Well, now that the conference games are over, it’s now time for me to go back to ignoring all things sports. I didn’t even know it was Super Bowl Sunday a while ago. When I found it was, I didn’t watch it. ~ Even though it’s spring break, I still have a chemistry project due in a week. Plus, I have to figure out how to balance equations in Chemistry. I’m really busting my ass in this class, I can only hope for a bloody C. ~ It’s strange that I’m having problems with Chemistry considering I kicked ass in Logic. They both deal with problem solving. One thing I will say is that, I’m enjoying understanding how the world is put together. ~ My writing group starts up tomorrow, can’t wait to see the good fellow writers again. I’m going to try to submit at least three chapters.

This is another Web cartoon site, but this one is much more R rated. The cartoons range from really bad to good. Here http://newgrounds.com/

Man, I am pissed! I went to the theater to watch Constantine. I paid for my ticket and went inside. The first thing I noticed was that it was the smallest theater room in the place. So, I sat down. The commercials at the beginning of the movie start. (Note: there was a strange “Public service announcement” for safe 4x4 driving with CGI creatures representing the 4x4s. This has got to be the strangest ad I’ve ever seen.) The movie starts and the sound quality is so bad that I got up and left the theater. I could barely hear the voices. I marched over to the ticket guy and asked for a refund. Instead, they talked me into a “rain check”. Now I have a free ticket to any movie I want. So, I guess things worked out in the end. I only saw 10 minutes of the film though. There’s always DVD.

I was checking the movie show times for Constantine, and I noticed the actual movie times. Some of these movies are so short its unbelievable! Has our MTV driven attention span gotten even shorter? I miss the good old days when it was okay to have a movie 2hr and 30 mins. Check it out. Are We There Yet? 1 hr 34 mins (Perhaps it should be shorter.) The Wedding Date 1 hr 28 mins (Maybe, it’s because they needed to keep it short, because all the boyfriends would be killing themselves for watching this Chick movie with their girlfriends.) Pooh's Heffalump Movie 1 hr 07 mins (What in Pooh’s Name is with this movie time? An hour and seven mins? Have kids gotten so hyperactive that that can’t sit for 1hr and 30 mins at least.)

Forget Bush, Gore, Kerry, and Clinton! I say vote for Captain Crunch in the next presidential election. Think about it. * He served in the military. He’s a captain for goodness sake! Everyone loves his crunch berries. (That didn’t come out the right way!) Uh, everyone loves his crunch berries cereal. He’s a crazy old man with a pimping hat. I can see the campaign slogan: The Cap’n can make it happen!

The man is a pimp! 

Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker The story In order to understand the story behind Batman Beyond, I have to go back to the TV show Batman Beyond. In the fist episode of the TV show, we see an older Bruce Wayne trying to save a life of young woman from kidnappers. This Bruce Wayne’s Batman is dressed differently that the younger version on the Batman TAS. This batman is slower and has gray hair. You can see the damage the years of crime fighting has done to his body and mind. During this rescue attempt, Batman’s body and mind give out on him. Things go wrong and Batman has to use a gun. (Unlike the Tim Burton films, Batman does not use guns or kill people!) Distraught over his failure and almost getting himself and the young woman killed, he walks away defeat. That is when he decides to retire from crime fighting all together. Many years later, a young boy by the name of Terry McGinnis looses his father to the now corrupt Wayne Enterprises. (During Bruce’s retirement, he steps down f...

I've found the term to fart knocker from urbandictionary.com here it is 1. fart-knocker A dumb ass My boss is a fartknocker. __________________________________ 1. fart knocker Originally slang for male homosexual, but the phrase has been used so widely (mainly by second-graders)that it now can mean almost anything. 1. I think Semaj must be a fart-knocker. 2. Hey, fart-knocker, your cheating! _________________________________ I just love the second grader part. BTW, I put the Semaj in that term.

~ What the hell is a fart knocker? How do you Knock farts? ~ I was driving downtown today and noticed a lot of unmarked cop cars park on the sides of the highway. There were at least six of seven clumped together. As I went off ramp, I saw even more cop cars parked on the streets. I took note of this and went on my way. Never put 2 and 2 together. President Bubba was in Louisville today. Aw shucks, ain’t we special… ~ This Semester has been a tough one! I’m going through a lot of pressure, but I WILL make it. ~ Why are the women that are cool to talk to are always dating someone else? ~ Someone at work questioned my manhood. They said I should have seen Constantine instead of Hitch. Fart Knocker!

Sometimes it pays to be nice to people. During my hour between classes, I was walking toward my next class. As I heading up to the doorway, I saw a middle aged woman, a teacher I guess. I’m usually an @sshole and never open a door for random people, but today was different. I saw her, and I opened the door. In return, she said, “Thank you, you have a wonderful Spring Break.” She smiled warmly to me. I nodded and replied, “You’re welcome, you as well.” After that, I felt something. (No, not gas!) I felt pretty good. Sure, it was a small gesture, but the fact she stopped and thanked me with well wishes, well it made my day. My day was pretty crappy up until that point. Well, almost time for work, time for me to reform back into my moody, selfish identity.

I will try to post something today. Try...

Well, I went to Wal-Mart this weekend and spotted the Back to the Future Trilogy on DVD for a cheap price. Since this was one of my favorite childhood movies, I was compelled to buy this DVD set. I’ll have more on these modern classics. I’m immersed in Chemistry and Astronomy homework and study at the moment. I’ll get around to posting the Good movie review in a few days.

Well, I’ve been writing for three hours now. With all the time I spend writing this book, I sometimes wonder if I’m even close to getting something published. I sometimes wonder if I have what it takes to be noticed. What makes me different the guy that mops floors at a fast food joint? Am I that creative or skilled? These things race through my mind everyday. Then again, perhaps self-doubt keeps us grounded in reality. It keeps us working hard, a drive to be better. Sorry about that! Now, back to bashing white castles and Ashton Kutcher.

What the hell? I keep buying those damn White Castles every weekend, and every weekend I always regret it. They don’t call them sliders for nothing. For the last time, I need to stop eating those cursed little burgers. Stay away from those little demon burger.

Cursed Demon burger, that you cant stop eating. Must use will power to stop...

Here they are, the Kutcher trading cards, below. Gotta catch them all!

"Yo, Puffy, if two people that suck stand together, does that make us not suck?" 

If Paul Walker and Keanu Reeves had a child together, this would be him.

"Look at me I'm a cowboy."  

Okay, so I watched Hitch. After reading the reviews on some sites, I decided to watch the damn movie. I got into the car and drove the very short trip to the theater. After reaching the actual theater, I noticed the audience was made up of couples, just as I feared. Oh, well. I liked the movie. It was…cute. A grown man should only call something cute once a day. (Note: unless it’s about a female. Such as, “She’s cute.”) Try the movie, either single or dating. Anyway, the trailers start, and something comes to me about the trailers. That damn Ashton Kutcher is in two trailers. People at work know how much I HATE Kutcher. Down with Kutcher!

This site is a Bad Movie Review site. I spend a lot of time reading their reviews. Try the Jaws movies Reviews, its the best of them all. http://www.jabootu.com/reviews.htm

Thank you to all the people who do actually read this crappy blog. And, a big thank you to the ppl who post feedback. I hope to keep this up.

Noob = not a short word for newbie. A noob is not someone who is new to something. This is the most misunderstood geek term in geekdom. Noobs are people who can be a Vet on whatever, but are very dumb. They act as if they know everything in some field, politics or gaming, but never take the time to learn. Keep in mind that a noob is lower than a Newbie. Love newbies and hate noobs. Newbie = a person is new at something. They are green. They are usually fresh face people who are open to anything. They are willing to learn. Most people should treat newbies with respect. We were all newbies at one point. 1337 = leekspeak meaning “elite” talk. A High form of Nerd and Geek. I don’t get it and never will. Gusher = a fan of something, so much of a fan in fact, they can never find flaws in that thing they are fans of. These fans will never admit that something is ever wrong with a show, game or leader. They will defend that thing to the death. NOTE these are hardcore fans, not all fans of tha...

I found this info on the last ep of Enterprise. I'll have more to say about this soon. But lets just say I'm not happy. Damn you Berman! Here's the link read at your own risk.

Blues Brothers 2000 The Story Elwood gets out of prison to find out his brother passed away. For reasons unknown, he decides to bring the band back together for another mission from God. Well, that’s pretty much it. That’s whole damn plot… I don’t know what else to say… oh well. The review It’s time again to review another crappy movie. This one is really bad. It’s so bad in fact I got so angry after I watched it. I couldn’t believe they tried to make another one without even John Belushi’s brother Jim. Who did they get to fill in? John Goodman. Goodman? What the hell? One thing I always found strange was that they called it Blues Brothers 2000, yet the movie was released in the late 90’s. This movie does everything in its power to destroy the original movie. How the hell did this movie ever get green lit and then filmed? Dan (get a job) Aykroyd decided there should be a sequel to original and wrote the script (if you want to call it that). ...

Crap Movie will be up soon, trust me.